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Date Posted: 08:23:49 11/05/09 Thu
Author: Sandi Stevens
Author Host/IP: 74.165.40.98
Subject: Re: seeking
In reply to: Rev. Mark McManus 's message, "Re: seeking" on 08:06:22 10/28/09 Wed

I think suicide is the worst to deal with not only for the reasons listed here already, but that it is natural to say "What did I do that may have caused it" or "What could I have done to prevent it"?
If you were to wait on a terminal patient hand and foot, you would still think you could have done more. Unfortunately, the self-blame game doesn't help anyone.
When I lost my first child,I concluded that the best healing process is to allow yourself to do so, and insist that others allow it as well. There should be no "you shouldn't feel that way", because the feelings are legitimate, and no "I know how you feel"...you don't...and worse, "you should be over this by now"....VERY disrespectful. But I mean that regarding all deaths of a lovd one, just more intensely to a suicide, as the guilt of both parties...the deceased and the survivor...are visited on the survivor.
Reminding the survivor that all things are possible with Christ Jesus is the good advice that the deceased obviously didn't get enough of in time. The sin would be to allow the survivor to make the same mistake.

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