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Date Posted: 21:54:52 10/30/01 Tue
Author: digital depression
Subject: Re: You UNFUNNY FUCKS
In reply to: My Grandmother 's message, "Re: You UNFUNNY FUCKS" on 19:41:18 10/30/01 Tue

Explain what's going on, I didn't understand any of that last part. They always have to talk so fast! Why do they have to talk so fast, they're forever "bababababaababa" and my mind just doesn't work that fast

I know... I hear you.

When my grandmother passed away, I recall the visits. She was closeby, just a few miles down the road, really. And she, too, started to slowly lose her wits. I guess I will too, when (if? ha!) I reach that age.

And I started to visit her less and less... I told myself it was "because I wanted to remember her the way she was" but in fact I was just a terrible human being. So much to do, so much to say.

And then, after leaving high school she was moved to a new facility in the city -- literally a five minute walk from my then-girlfriend. But I never dropped by. I'd have empty sex within a mile radius, but I could never drum up the... compassion? Humanity? Basic, decent goodness? To visit, and quite really "make" her day.

She died, eventually, of kidney failure. And in a way, I think she was the lucky one. For ever since I have found myself without soul and it slowly eats at me. Her death was quick. I die a little more every day.


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