Ryan: What In The Hell Is This?!

Waiter: Um sure that is what you ordered.

Ryan: This is your damn All-Star Burger?! Look what it looks like in the damn picture.

Waiter: Well um sir....

Ryan: Spit it out! I want what is in that damn picture or somebody is going to get an ass kicking

Waiter: Well sir if that's what it takes I might have to just call Willy Bubba.

Ryan: *Spits Out His Coke In Laughter* Haha Willy Bubba?! That's a damn guy from an ICP song. So go ahead and bring Willy Bubba out and see what happens.

The crowd gasps and then moves to the side as the waiter calls for 'Willy Bubba'. Then after a couple seconds Willy Bubba walks out from the back. Ryan laughs and falls off his stool as a big fat overweight man steps from behind the door. Willy Bubba has about three teeth total, a long ZZ-Top kinda beard with food bits in it, ripped up jeans and a pair of raggidy boots from 1981. Ryan gets to his feet and whips off his adidas shorts and his DCShoeCoUsa sweatshirt. Ryan cracks his knuckles and then whips off his Etnies shoes. Ryan steps back in shoot fighter position while Willy Bubba stands in a boxer type position. Ryan steps back and kicks Bubba in the stomach and gives him a right hook. Bubba stumbles back dazed and then McBain knocks him out with a SuperKick. McBain then grabs the waiter by his shirt and demands the burger. The waiter shakes and then you can hear some dripping on the floor.

Ryan: I don't even want to know what that dripping is coming from.

Waiter: *Says Nervously* Here's your burger, sir

Ryan: Ya damn right!

Ryan takes a huge bite of the burger and then makes a akward face. Ryan spits the burger out all over the waiters uniform.

Ryan: This place f---in sucks!

Waiter: Sir could you please watch you language!

Ryan: Oh yea! Watch this!

With that Ryan slams his open burger into the waiters face and then shoves him backwards landing him on his butt.

Ryan: Later b----es!!

Ryan gets off the stool and walks out of the place as a bloody Willy Bubba gets to his feet. Ryan gets into his 2000 Dodge Viper and then drives off leaving a pile of dust in the wind. The next camera shot is in the passengers seat of Ryan's viper. Ryan looks into the camera and then onto the road.

Ryan: All I wanted was a damn good-tasting hamburger! But no Redneck Joes, had some bullsh-t burgers so now I have to wait until I get to the damn hotel. So I might as well just cut my promo in my brand new Viper rather then the hotel. Now in less then 24 hours three of the greatest HWF wrestlers of all time, of course I am talking about Ryan McBain, Pirona and Extreme take on three of the worst wrestlers of all time Eric 'Suck Azz' Jackson and Team Extremely Lame. Now first off I am going to speak a little bit about Eric 'DumbAzz' Jackson. Now Eric you think your the god of wrestling and that you can return to HWF and expect to be a favorite automatically? Now there is something seriously wrong with you if you think that. Now you maybe a former World, IC and Tag Team Champion but that was before I was in the HWF. And now that I am all those statistics are nothing but bullsh-- and tommorrow I am going to knock some sense into you and bring you back down to reality. You say you returned to HWF to take out people like me? Well Eric I hate to spoil your dreams but that is never ever going to happen. I am going to be riding high on HWF for a very long time and nobody like you can or will be able to stop me. Jackson once I end your career tommorrow in that hell in a cell and end yet another legends career then I will be on my road to the World HeavyWeight Title! Jackson, I don't know much about you but what I do know is that your a complainer and not a very dedicated to the HWF. But since I am working my way hard up the ladder I focus on HWF and HWF alone. Eric Jackson tommorrow in your return match the whole world will see you fall at the hands of the eWo. Your whole returning will be shambled and in ruins because you got crushed by Ryan McBain. Eric Jackson, I am the leader of the new breed that is taking HWF over! Now once that bell rings and we lock-up you can bet your ass is going to be laid out in a matter of seconds. With that being that I am the god of extreme high-flying and there is and never will be someone as great as me. You may be a high flyer but nobody is as extreme in the high flying division as me. Eric Jackson, tommorrow night your going to get the most severe azz kicking you have ever gotten!

Ryan takes a gulp from his Gatorade bottle and then turns the radio up a bit.

Ryan: Haha I love this damn song! *'Bad Touch' By BloodHound Gang is playing* This song is awesome! *Starts Singing The Tune* We can do it like they do on the DisCovery Channel, *McBain then remembers that he is cutting a promo* Oh yea my fault, sorry about that. Now I still have to discuss my other two opponents Team Extremely Lame. That would also be 'The King Of Hardcore Guy Porn' Jay Man and his little anal buddy Hardcore Jay. Now we have fought eachother at least five times before. And each and almost every time I have come out on top of the match. Now first off I am going to discuss a little bit about Hardcore Jay. Now Hardcore Jay, you have got to be the guy that has been in HWF with the worst record. Now that might be White Jobber but I am going to go with you on this one. Now you can go ahead and preach about how your hard f'n core and this and that, but when it really comes down to you it infact practically nothing. The only reason people think your hardcore is because you carry a kendu stick and a beer much like ECW Hardcore Legend Sandman. Hardcore Jay tommorrow I am going to show you what being an extreme wrestler is all about. That hell in a cell structure is where some of the most extreme stunts happen and tommorrow your going to be taken to school courtesy of Ryan McBain. See I am on my way to winning the HWF World Heavyweight title and I am not going to let little punks like Hardcore Jay stand in my way. Hardcore Jay tommorrow you will be thought by the master of the high flying division why you will no longer be wanted in HWF. I will end your career and save the Prez some time and HWF some money. You do not deserve to be wrestling with such great superstars as the eWo. Hardcore Jay, you might as well come down to the ring drunk because weither your sober or drunk the ass kicking will be handed out either way. Now onto Hardcore Jay's anal buddy Jay Man! The shortest-reigning world champion of all time and the lamest hardcore wrestle of all time. Jay Man you think you a big badd ass because your just now getting popular in the last oh let's say month? That's 10 months you worked and tried in HWF but you sucked up until a month ago. And well that's when people started feeling sorry for you and started to cheer you when your lame theme played. Walk, Re-Spect! What kind of lame ass theme is that?! Jay Man tommorrow I am going to do all the HWF fans a favor and that is take you off of HWF TV permanently. You lost your 'spark' about 5 months ago and have been riding on your brothers small push and then the fans just started cheering you out of compassion like they did to WCW's Jim Duggan and Norman Smiley. Both are old losers but they still get cheered because the crowd is sympathetic. Jay Man if you could actually get over just by your skills then well your pops would probably be just like they have been your whole f---in career. Jay Man tommorrow night you will face the innovator of offense and I will surely hand you an ass whipping like nobody could ever dish out. Jay Man, you will most likely collapse on your own because nobody and I mean no f'n body can keep up with Ryan McBain for a whole damn match!