Author:
Dunk Earl of the hammerhead shark region of Teedkidleshire.
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Date Posted: 02:33:59 01/08/02 Tue
Good morning ladies and gentlemen,
Hello and welcome to Message Board anonymous, the new site designed for addicts and simpletons alike for the sole purpose of weening you, the simpletons off the message board and back into the real world of wanking, television, tea, sardine and cheese on pretzels and wanking a bit more.
This will be a long hard proccess and chaffing may occur over the first few days but do not be alarmed, in the real world chaffing is rife, not like on this message board where amusing anecdotes about lovejoy and tinkers sexual relations with some old posh bird in a statley home are common place.
Now for your first step back to normality you must have a cup of tea. Buy a Jamie Oliver book if you can't remember how to make one, the dosey big tounged mockney cunt should have some new and Ingenious way of making tea involving olive oil, tyne, basil and some other crap ingredient you can only buy from a small italian man who lives in a castle in shoreditch.
Now drink your tea. Do not save it for later drink it now! and with a biscuit but not a pink one remember it's still early days yet.
Now before your regestration fee of £873.09 in credited into my bank account you must prepare for the next session. Go and find the Marks and Spencers catalouge your mum picked up before christmas and then never used cus it's shit and find the underware section Let me now point out that i am reffering to the womens underware section so Jon stop looking at the nice cotton briefs at £9.99 for a pack of three, yes they do look roomy and comfortable but homosexuality is still illegal in sutton so turn to the women, Do it Now!!!
Now wank untill you go blind or fall off your sisters bed and then go to sleep making sure not to put your head in the wet patch.
Pay me more money and i will help you further just reply first ok twats.
Love you all, Mr Earl walks like a coloured chap latcham . x
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