Date Posted:14:45:20 04/16/00 Sun Author:The_One311 Author Host/IP: ppp223-rch.klondyke.net / 209.155.37.222 Subject: STAR WARS EPISODE 1 DEATHMATCH
Alright, here it goes........
The contestants are: Darth Maul, Jar Jar Binks, Queen Amidala, Mace Windu, Yoda, R2-D2, C-3P0, Jabba the Hutt, Darth Sidious, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn, Watto, Captain Panaka, Destroyer Droid, Anakin Skywalker, and Senator Palpatine.
(Please dont argue with me about Sidious and Palpatine being the same person. I was just running out of characters)
ROUND 1:
Match 1: Darth Maul vs. Jar Jar Binks
Location: Gungan Battlefield
Jar Jar: Mesa donta wanta diea!!!!
( Darth Maul then slices off Jar Jar's head. Finally, that annoying platypus is dead!)
Match 2: Queen Amidala vs. Mace Windu
Location: The Podraces
Mace: Yo, bitch! Get on your knees and well, you know what to do!
Queen: Hey! I am a royal authority figure! For that comment, I order you to death!
Mace: Aw, I'll just my hoes on your ass!
(Mace then summons a bunch of alien prostitues who rip the Queen to pieces. Mace promises to pay them 50 bucks later.)
Match 3: Yoda vs. R2-D2 (The rematch from The Empire Strikes Back!)
Location: The Gungan Swamp
Yoda: So my child, have you come back to get the flashlight that I stole from Luke? Have it you cannot! Mine it is! MINE!
(R2 then stretches out his robotic hand and attempts to take the flashlight from Yoda. He is successful.)
Yoda: NO! Give it back!
(Yoda then uses the force to throw R2 into the lake where the Gungans live. He is then eaten by a large fish, which is then eaten by a larger fish, then a larger fish, then a.....)
Yoda: Damn! I forgot my flashlight!
So, what do you think so far??? SHould I keep going?
