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Date Posted: 14:27:48 07/31/02 Wed
Author: Sonali
Subject: Something that came across my mind...a SS called Rescue Me

Alright, I was at work and the damn scanner is still broken so I had nothing to do so I figured I'd let my imagination free for a bit...just a little short story for anyone who bothers to read my stuff...hehe. Hope ya like it!


RESCUE ME

Guys come and go in our lives. We look back and can’t help but laugh when we remember some of the guys we’ve dated. Which leads us to realize how much we’ve matured over time. However, when we think about our history of men in our lives, there’s bound to be THE ONE that stands alone. The one who truly made a meaningful impact on your life. HE was your first true love. And for some of us, the only true love.

HE knows you better than you know yourself. HE knows everything about your life, your family, your friends. HE knows just what to say or do in any situation. HE can determine what kind of mood you’re in based on a single gesture, facial expression, anything, And HE will adjust accordingly. HE is the only one who can bring a smile to your face no matter how determined you are to be angry at the world. HE is the first man you gave your heart to completely, and HE did the same for you.

Your relationship was the kind that everyone envied. It was clear you two loved each other but you never did any of the cheesy things that made people around you want to vomit. No baby talk, no silly pet names, no secrets which caused an uncontrollable fit of giggles because they referenced something that happened in the bedroom (or other places if you’re the adventurous type). Of course you didn’t hold back from public displays of affection, but you did it in such a way that only brought smiles to everyone’s faces. Why? Because it wasn’t forced – it came naturally. You both went with the flow – let things take their own course.

Somehow, someway, that course led you two apart. For a while, you both tried to fight it, make things seem to be as they once were but it wasn’t going to happen. If you two didn’t end things now, there would be no hope for a friendship or any kind of relationship in the future and that was the last thing you both wanted. So you accepted defeat grudgingly. As much as the breakup hurt you and HIM, it was for the best. It was amicable and you both promised to remain friends. You both wanted that but you both also knew that it would take time. You weren’t angry with one another but it’s impossible to go from sharing such a strong and intense relationship to one of casual friendship overnight.

The first few weeks were nothing but pure hell. The tears – oh the tears that were shed. You wanted to be strong, composed, and happy, trying to get back to normal but there was one thing standing in the way – the fact that you were human and had a broken hear that needed mending. You cursed yourself when you let your mind wander to thoughts of HIM – the memories you two shared. But slowly you start thinking about HIM less as you keep yourself busy, getting back into a routine that did not include HIM. As you lay in bed at night, before drifting off to sleep, you realize that you went the day without thinking about HIM. But then you want to hit yourself once you realize that you did end up thinking about HIM when you pointed out that you went the day without thinking about HIM. But slowly, even that stops as you’re able to go longer without thinking about HIM – whether it’s to point out that you didn’t think about HIM or not. Soon, the tears lessen, the smiles increase and before you know it, it’s been three whole months without him in your life. And then you take the giant leap of agreeing to go on the first post-breakup date.

Of course the first few dates were nothing but wretched – you picked each guy apart, dismissing them because they lacked something HE had. Then you begin to realize that no one could ever compare to HIM and it wasn’t right or healthy for you to keep yourself shut off from affection because he didn’t have perfect teeth like HE did. So you give it another try, keeping a much more open mind and much to your surprise, you start to like this new guy.

You take things very slowly with the new guy and he’s more than understanding. You don’t divulge into great detail about your previous relationship but you make it clear that it was one of substance. At first you felt guilty as you entered into this new relationship because it was clear that he adored you and you…well, you liked him. But then you realize that it’s not fair to torture yourself like that – and soon you adopt your old attitude of letting things take their own course.

Then one day when you’re out shopping, that very same course crashes right into HIM. The first thing that crosses your mind is thank god the new guy isn’t with you. At first you both don’t know what to say. It’s only been six months and 13 days since you last saw each other, but who was counting, right? You both manage to make small talk for a few minutes and then as you’re about to go your separate ways yet again, HE says HE will give you a call and you say okay and try to go on with your day.

Of course, that’s next to impossible. You’re in a complete daze, a zombie almost, all day long. You’re dissecting every second of every minute of your encounter. Just when you thought you had gotten HIM out of your system, he slowly seeped back in. You wonder if he has a new girlfriend. He seemed happy and he definitely looked good. You call and cancel your date and of course he’s concerned but you tell him it’s nothing to be worried about and you’ll call him tomorrow. Then you call your girlfriends and tell them who you saw and within 15 minutes, they’re at your place equipped with the essentials – tissues, chocolate and alcohol. Surprisingly, the tissues aren’t needed. You didn’t cry at all. It was hard for you to explain your feelings because you don’t know exactly what you’re feeling. Obviously HE will always have a piece of your heart but you realize that you did breakup for a valid reason. And of course you were with someone new. Finally you come to the conclusion that HE is nothing more than a friend now. What you felt for him in the past will remain in the past. You thank your lucky stars you have such great friends.

For the next few days you feel a bit anxious everytime the phone rings, thinking it could be HIM. Soon you realize you’re being stupid and get back to normal. Things are going great with you and the new guy and HE doesn’t cross your mind at all. That is, of course, until you see HIM again. And then your whole resolve crumbles, leaving your heart exposed and vulnerable.



For me, Sonali, HE was Justin Timberlake. We met at a club called Funky Buddha Lounge in Chicago. He and the rest of the group, plus their entourage were unwinding after a concert. I was there with my friends, celebrating one of their birthdays. Of course we got a little excited when we heard NSYNC was there but we weren’t diehard fans. Sure we liked a few of their songs and we thought they were cute but we were NOT the type to throw ourselves at them, like the majority of the other girls there. While I was at the bar, I saw JC and Justin on the other side, waiting for their drinks as well. I casually glanced over and saw them talking to each other. Just as I turned to make my way back to my friends, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to find JC in front of me.

“Excuse me, but my friend over there wanted to invite you and your friends to join us in the VIP section,” JC said.

“Well why couldn’t your friend do it himself? And we’re not groupies so I don’t think we’re the type of girls you’re looking for to join you in the VIP area,” I said.

“No, I didn’t mean for you to think we thought you were groupies. I mean, I can understand why you would, but honestly we’re not like that. And believe it or not, my friend is shy when it comes to pretty girls,” JC said with a smile.

“Well, no offense but I do find it hard to believe you guys aren’t like that. And if he’s so shy, why should we hang out with y’all if he can’t invite us himself? Thanks, but no thanks,” I said. Puhlease, Justin Timberlake shy around girls – I don’t think so, I thought to myself as I made my way over to my friends. I was in the middle of telling them what happened when I felt a familiar tap on my shoulder. I turned around and this time it was Justin.

“Alright, you were right – we’re guilty of being typical guys and hooking up with girls. And no, I’m not shy when it comes to girls, but in all honesty, I can tell you and your friends are NOT the hooking up type of girls, groupies, whatever. We’d really like it if you’d join us,” Justin said. I smiled.

“Now had you been up front and honest like this from the beginning, we’d have been partying with you guys for a bit longer now. But the night is still young and the club doesn’t close until 4am. Lead the way,” I said. He smiled and we all made our way to the VIP area.

We clicked instantly, me not being fazed by his celebrity status, him loving that fact very much, among other things about me. We took things slowly. Though I wasn’t fazed by his status, it still took me a bit to get acclimated to the idea that I was indeed dating a celebrity and that thrust me into the spotlight over time. We worked together to get through the initial tough times and managed to build this beautiful relationship that lasted close to two years. To this day I think we both still don’t know what exactly went wrong but we do know that we went wrong somewhere. It wasn’t his hectic schedule because he got an apartment here in Chicago with me and when I had time off, I was down in Orlando or on the road with him. It wasn’t the rumors of him hooking up with another celebrity or groupie because they were just that – rumors. There was that essential bond of trust we built and it was never broken. I think we just started wanting different things. I realized my grades had begun to falter and we both started to lose focus on the other things and people in our lives. That brought about a lot of frustration which we took out on each other and that’s when we knew we had to end it before there was nothing left to salvage from our deteriorating relationship.

Of course it took me a little longer to not think about him all the time since he was, well, Justin. On the radio, on TV, in magazines. But I did manage to get over him as much as I could. He had been my first true love, as corny as that sounds. I hadn’t fallen in love with him because he was teen heartthrob Justin Timberlake. I fell in love with him because he was Justin. Despite the end of our relationship and despite my futile confirmations of being over him, deep down I always knew he’d have a piece of my heart. Of course this realization hit me like a ton of bricks not when I ran into him at the mall but when he showed up at my door nearly a month later.




Ryan, my current boyfriend had gone out of town to visit his brother in Connecticut. He had invited me along but I knew I’d be nothing but a third wheel and told him to enjoy a weekend of brotherly bonding. I was reveling in the immense relaxation I was experiencing at the moment. It was Friday evening and I was unwinding from a long day of class and work. It was storming outside – my favorite kind of weather. It was soothing to hear the rain pelting against the windows and the lightening blazing across the darken sky. The lights were dimmed inside and I had music playing softly as I sat on my couch, enjoying a glass of red wine. I was surprised when I heard a knock on my door. I got up to answer it and shocked when I looked through the peephole to find a rain-soaked Justin on the other side of the door. Instantly I got nervous and debated on whether or not to open the door. I quickly ran my hands through my hair and straightened my clothes out. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

“Hi,” he said simply.

“Justin, what are you doing here?”

“Nice to see you too,” he joked.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Come in,” I said, opening the door wider. He smiled and came in. He was soaked to the bone. I closed the door and gently took off his jacket, my fingertips slightly grazing his shoulders. I caught him by surprise since he had his back to me.

“I was in town, actually here to pack up my apartment,” he said.

“Oh. You’re moving?” Obviously if he was packing, I thought to myself.

“Yeah, I figured I didn’t have any reason to keep it here anymore,” he said, looking right at me. It was surreal, almost, the situation at hand. There he was, standing in my apartment, soaking wet from the storm outside, lights dimmed low inside, music playing softly in the background. Oh yes, the music. As if on cue, Ashanti’s ‘Rescue’ came on.



‘You still scared, I’ll be scared too, it’s cool
though,just holla back aight.'



“So last time I checked, your apartment was across town. What brought you here,” I asked.



‘All alone and I’m feeling wanted
Try to wait but my body’s calling.’



“Well I was packing and I found some things – things I kept that were tokens of affection as they call it. They were from you. That got me thinking about you and I realized I wanted – needed – to see you.”



‘You’re the one so why don’t you come and rescue me
I’ll be here while you’re on your way
Counting down till I see your face.’




“Why? I mean last time I saw you, I remember you saying you would call me,” I said, not in an angry tone. I was just stating a fact. He knew I wasn’t angry with him. Like I said, he knew me better than I knew myself. He sighed.

“Well you could have picked up the phone too. But you’re right, I said I would call but I didn’t. It had taken me so long to try and get used to you not being in my life. Even now I’m not used to it and I don’t think I ever will be. I stood outside for 20 minutes before I could bring myself to knock on your door.”



‘Hurry up cause I love the way you rescue me
Now you’re here, come on out the rain
Soaking wet, body glistening.’




“Well what do you want me to say? You tell me you need to see me but it takes you 20 minutes to knock on my door. I don’t understand.”

“I don’t understand either. I know we broke up saying it was for the best, but was it really? To this day, there’s no definite, solid reason for why we did. I need to know if I really do have a reason to stay, Sonali.” My mind was screaming no but my heart was screaming yes. I didn’t know what to say or do.



‘Finally we can do something so rescue me
Can’t believe how it’s going down.’




“Justin, there’s someone else,” I said softly.

“There was someone else in my life, too. But I realized my heart wasn’t in it. It wasn’t fair to her and so I ended it. My heart is still with you. Can you honestly say your heart is in this new relationship?” I sighed.



‘I’m so obsessed with this love I found
It got my head spinning round and round
Just rescue me.’




“No,” I said softly. If there was one thing I couldn’t do, it was lie to Justin. He slowly made his way closer to me. With every step he took, I felt my legs get weaker.

“Where is your heart?”

“With you.”



‘All night long take me away to another place
Rescue me
Save me, save me, save me all night long
Take me to another place
Rescue me
Save me, save me, save me.’




“It’s been nothing but hell without you. I miss your smile, those sparkling brown eyes, your lips, your soft skin against mine,” he said, gently running his fingertips across my lips.



‘I come alive when I feel your touch
And I can drown in this pool of love
You could get what I’m thinking of
Come rescue me.’




“You’re soaking wet. Let me get you a towel,” I said. He grabbed my arm and pulled me into him. I reveled in the feeling of his arms wrapped around me. He tilted my chin up and our lips came crashing together.



‘What you think couldn’t be replaced
If you were gone I would find a way to get you back
Cause I love the way you rescue me.’




“I missed you so much,” Justin said.

“I missed you. It’s been so hard to get you out of my system but I realized that it’s impossible. We really should get you out of these wet clothes,” I said as I slowly peeled his shirt off. He grinned and kissed me again.

“Well if I’m getting out of these clothes then we might as well get rid of yours too.”



‘Laying here with you in the dark
I always knew you could shift my heart
When I’m with you I don’t want to stop so rescue me
Only you can fulfill my need
Take me away from this agony
I want to live out my fantasy
Just rescue me.’




We eventually made our way to the bedroom and after a few hours, I found myself gently playing with random curls on Justin’s head. He was sleeping peacefully, completely oblivious to the raging storm outside, completely oblivious to the raging storm within myself. I was beyond confused as to what to do now. Things had become so complicated in such a short time.



‘All night long take me away to another place
Rescue me
Save me, save me, save me all night long
Take me to another place
Rescue me
Save me, save me, save me.’




I didn’t sleep at all that night and in the morning, Justin awoke with a smile on his face. That brought about a smile to my face.

“This is how it should be – always,” he said. I didn’t know what to say so I just kissed him. We got up and made our way downstairs. He put his now dry clothes back on.

“Justin, what now?”

“Well, do I have a reason to keep my apartment here?” I swallowed hard. I leaned my head against his chest.

“Honestly, you’ll always have a reason. But do you think we can have what we did in the past?”

“I don’t know. But I’m willing to find out. Are you?” I was scared – scared of losing him again. Was it worth it to take that risk and find out? I knew I didn’t have the strength to go through losing him all over again. But would I lose him again? Could this be it? Would be really be together forever, like the fairytales say? I just didn’t know.

“I don’t know,” I said softly.


THE END

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