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Date Posted: 15:10:30 07/24/00 Mon
Author: Melodie
Subject: Re: POLL -- "it's all in your head"
In reply to: Chloe 's message, "POLL -- "it's all in your head"" on 06:14:05 07/16/00 Sun

Count me in; the first was my 3rd neuro, an MS specialist. He DID NOT say it was ALL in my head, but he thought part of it was or that my mind was contributing. Anyway, it was enough to make me mad! It was 11 months after symptoms started. He's the only one, but it scared me and, in my opinion, my medical record too. I've wondered if it had anything to do with my honesty of telling them I had been diagnosed with depression (years before, since then, it is gone). Even though I should know what depression is like (I knew it then and admitted it) and I tell them it is not related now, they think they know me better than I do. FRUSTRATING!!

I also have strikes against me on appearance. (I always look my best when I go, when I should let them see what I normally look like. I curl my hair maybe once every 2 months since I got sick; I simply do not have the strength to do it, but I always go with it done to the doc. They don't know how much it has limited my life. I am also overweight since I got on meds-before I'd lost about 20 pounds- and people w/MS are supposedly skinny.)

Plus I've had no family history (though there's only a 10% chance of a family member passing it).

The biggest reason I see though is that most doctors are scientists at heart; they want something they can clearly see (on test results) and get the same result repeatedly. Since they can't jump into my body and feel how real my symptoms are for themselves, they don't believe it. They arogantly act as if they know what is goign on inside my body (by saying that it is partly mental) even though they have no clue what has caused the whole thing; they can't even name it!

Then there's the old mental fallback in the case that medical science couldn't identify the cause of the illness! (As if we can test for everything or even have a name for everything!) They certainly cannot and never will be able to feel what my illness is like so you would think my account (and visable symptoms, like spasms) would be the fall back. What happened to trusting your patient?! Too many people are told that they have a mentally based illness and thousands of dollars later are told it's MS or soemthing else.

I wish I was making it all up! If I was then I could stop and it would all go away! Who wants all this?! I knew nothing about MS and even the doctor who said it was partly psycogenic admitted my symptoms were MS symptoms. I guess it's just a coincidence that the ones I created perfectly matched the ones for MS!!

I feel better now! Sorry! This is one of my favorite topics to rave about! I hope I can keep this experience fresh in my mind when I become a doctor and remember what it is like to be a sick patient in need of help and scared. There's not much worse than being sick, afraid , in pain, and then going to your doc asking for help only to hear that you are the problem! Let's start attacking diseases not patients!

Melodie

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