A mistake of youth -- Rage Against the Apocalypse

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Date Posted: 10:58:57 02/18/02 Mon
Author: Blitz
Subject: A mistake of youth

He is home back in New York, the great valley of steel and concrete. Night has come turning the city into a sea of silhouettes and numerous lights either towering towards the winter sky, or moving like an artificial stream. Blitz remains sitting on the couch with the small, black cordless in hand as he had been for over two hours. The apartment dark besides from the green blue lights coming from the stereo, he has had the same low song on repeat for just as long as he been sitting. The Shroud plays low and the lead singers melancholy voice mix with the slow, gently playing instruments consisting of dreary hums from a guitar, a slow throb of bass and lonely chimes of a piano. Its� a song of questions and sad words as often what their music is, her downcast voice sultry with it�s sadness. �Let me move on, let me move on, let me on too!� she strums from times to time. He close his eyes then lays his head against the back of the couch unsure what to do, but knowing he can�t tell the others.

He sits the phone on his lap and then just covers his face for a moment, feeling the sudden sadness build in his chest and work it�s way up, he begins to just cry silently to himself. The confusion swirling around and making his pulse rise and his heart speed up, he wipes his tears picking up the pictures from the table once more. So many faces from the past, friends, his father, his little sister, his ex girlfriend, his uncle and mother. All forever etched upon those glossy surfaces the way he remembered them. When he does sit them down the choice returns to him yet again as the lead singer begins to sing her mournful plea that will always never be answered. He picks the phone up once more wiping away a few tears, though common sense would worn all others, he is but a cub amongst that metropolis wilderness and the loneliness for someone who was once popular is a lot to bear. Having debuting on calling Artemis to just talk but not wanting to seem weaker then either her nor Dargo.

He begins to dial, pushing the on button causing the small green light to come on. Each time he push a digit, his heart race a little faster and it gets just a little harder to breath. It feels like each monotone cry of the phone last forever but he does it. Pushing each key which brings him closer, before there is a pause in the sound and only the music slowly willow into the dimly lit air of the apartment. Then a ring, then another ring, followed by a third, fourth, fifth, sixth, then the sound of the clack of plastic as the receiver is picked up and some answers.

�Hello, Lastanza residence.� A very nonchalant but elegant voice of a female says as cooly as always. There is a pause, the type that can only be made when a breath catches and is unable to be released, when the chest tightens and the pulse raise causing seconds to become sort burs of eternity. �Hello?� She says once again as patiently as she did the first time.

�Mom?� Blitz finally lets out quietly with a trembling voice and yet again the burst of eternities follow, yet this time they come from both ends. �Mom...it�s me.�

�.............� There is no response, just that tight chested silence and electric of shock.

�Mom..it�s Roy..please...� Blitz feels the tears welling up as fear, panic and hundreds of other things clog his breathing and cause his heart to ache. �Please...just say something...it�s me...it�s Roy!�

�Roy...� It�s almost sounded like a startled sob, ones that come when a wound is reopened.
�Mom, I have missed you...I wanted to come home...I was going to, but I couldn�t.� He whispers sorrowfully knowing the pain he must be causing, it causes him to lower the phone a moment to get a hold of himself before going on. � I couldn�t come home...�

�Roy...� Is all that follows from the other end once more and a pause once again strangles the two before she speaks once more. �I thought you were dead...we had a funeral and everything when they found only blood on your jacket, my cub...your alive!�

�Yeah...I really miss you, and dead and even sis....I miss you all.� He says with a trembling voice wiping away more tears.

�Roy, what happened? What did someone do to you?� Her voice becomes nostalgic and tinted with a very low simmering rage.

He tells her about how it all began, the club, the Vampire, waking up alone, watching the funeral, working for the Vampire for years, running from California, wandering for years, arriving in NY, meeting the angel who destroyed the Vampiric curse, of his two mentors and the trip to the silver pool and the story finally comes to an end after nearly a half an hour. He talks to her excitedly but cautious, almost frighten which he doesn�t understand why. He has no idea how much things have really changed the moment he stepped foot in that pool, he doesn�t know she quietly writes as he speaks and someone else has picked up another phone in the house, he doesn�t know he nails are nearly digging into her palms. �That..is what happen mom.� he finishes softly.

�My poor boy, you must be terrified?� She says softly though her nails are nearly drawing blood as much as the eaves listener. �Roy, tell me where you are, I will come to you.�

It takes a moment to work up the courage, to say something he has never said to the women who nurtured him, protected and defended him, encouraged him...but he knows he can�t and the fear wells up and he still don�t understand why. �Mom....I can�t..� He feels the tears building and his heart aches with each syllable. �I can�t...�

There is a silence between the two and she cries to herself for a moment, a pain only her cub can ever inflict, bites deep and she feels like she could howl with that pain until her throat bled. Yet she compose herself when a large hand squeezes her shoulder reassuringly, her own small, slender hand coming to rest upon it as her silent tears wet her face. �Roy, your being brain washed honey, listen to me...please.� She utters quietly feeling her voice weaken and only the hand upon her shoulder steadies her with strength.

�I just called to tell you I was okay...I am always thinking about you, and everyone else...I miss you all..I love you mom, at least always know..I love with..I always will...� He wipes his tears away then close his eyes, mustering his strength and finally he pushes the off button letting the phone fall into his lap. With that his hand conceal his face once more.

She is silent even as her tears fall she remains regal, close her coal eyes feeling a finger dab her tears away. �Shhh, he is our cub Ezabelle...and I will bring him back to you.� The deep voice says causing her to look up, her large tearful eyes becoming trusting, and a very faint smile tugs her full lips.

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