Big Future Plans - Unplanned Pregnancy -- Unplanned Pregnancy Advice Board

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Subject:

Big Future Plans - Unplanned Pregnancy

Author:
Michelle (Tired, Scared, Worried)

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Date Posted: 05/18/08 9:45pm

I'm only 18 years old. I've been late on my period for a little over two weeks now. I took a home pregnancy test today and it came up positive. I'm calling the clinic tomorrow to make an appointment, (I know they accept walk-ins, I want a set time, I don't want to wait anymore!!!), and I'm scared. I don't know what to think or anything. The father is in the Army and right now miles away from me. He wants everything to do with the kid, and he says that he loves me. I know that he won't abandon this child, (if i am definitely pregnant), because he already has one child. Although the mother is trying for full custody, he still wants everything to do with his first daughter. So I do know that he will be around and he will do all he can to take care of me. I've known him for years and I trust him, so I'm not afraid of what will happen with him.
What I am afraid of, and worried about, is my future. I just enlisted into the Army in December and I am supposed to leave in about two weeks for Basic Training. Now this is thrown at me? I had so many plans. Right now there are only three people that know that the home pregnancy test came up with positive results. Those people are my mom, my sister, and the father. They are all behind me 100% on my choice. My mom has had an abortion before and she told me about her experience with it. She told me her experiences of pregnancy as well. She's been a real help, and I love her for it, but I need an outside point of view. I have pretty much always been against abortion, but now I'm faced with a choice. The father leaves for Iraq in November and won't be around for the birth. My mom told me to consider all my options, and so did my step-dad. (Okay so there's four that know) There's a big part of me that does not in any way want to have an abortion, and only a small part of me is considering it. The biggest thing I am afraid of is the fact that I won't be able to support my baby. I don't know what to do... I guess maybe I just need someone to talk to, or some advice. Can anyone help me?

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Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Big Future Plans - Unplanned Pregnancy

Author:
Heather
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Date Posted: 05/30/08 1:38am

Hi Michelle,

I'm really glad you posted here. If the 'main' thing you're afraid of, as you say, is supporting the child I would say 'don't worry about that!' Easier said than done, of course, but really in our country, with so much available to moms with children in the way of financial support, that should never be a reason to decide between life and death.

You are blessed in having your baby's father around for emotional and physical support, even if often away, and the support of your family, too. I think you should go with your instincts and if you 'know' that abortion is wrong don't do it to yourself or your baby!

Unplanned pregnancies are never easy (frankly, neither are a lot of planned ones, lol) but they are often 'less impossible' than can fearfully be surmised at first.

I'd say if you can honor life and nurture this new little one inside you you'll find that a good foundation for which to think clearly about 'plan b's' for your career plans. Sometimes life takes unexpected twists and turns and we simply have to flex with the tapestry.

On the bright side, sometimes the unexpected can be the greatest joys and wonder.

Hang in there and keep us posted!

With Kindness,

Heather