Broken Hearted -- Unplanned Pregnancy Advice Board

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Subject:

Broken Hearted

Author:
Kay (Sadness)

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Date Posted: 10/11/07 12:39pm

I am 29 years old, married to a wonderful man. I have a step-daughter that is 11 and we have two boys together 6 and 19 months. After my youngest I knew I was done. However, now I find myself in an unplanned pregnancy. I have always been pro-choice.

A little background, things have been rough in our home the past year. Constant life changes, my husband recently diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, along with going through a serious financial hardship because of being out of work for 6 months. We are still trying to pay off medical bills from my youngest. We have a hard enough time keeping food on the table for our boys and the lights turned on in the house. It's been a struggle on us emotionally.

So here I am, married with children and expecting and faced with the decision that I don't feel that we are emotionally or finacially capable of bringing another life into the world. I'm ashamed and broken at thought of what must be done. but I don't feel that we can provide the life for another child. I know my limits but it breaks my heart to admit them.

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Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Broken Hearted

Author:
Pat
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Date Posted: 10/11/07 2:21pm

Hi, Kay,

Being pro-choice doesn't have anything to do with your current situation. It's a political question, and what you are facing is a matter of the heart.

There are some natural treatments that will help with bipolar disorder. I have been reading a book called A Drug-Free Approach to Healthcare by Dr. David W. Tanton. Try to see if you can get a used copy from Amazon.com. It's not a cheap book, but it's also not outrageously expensive, and it contains a wealth of information. Later on, when I have a little time, I'll try to write about what it says about bipolar disorder. I can offer some information off the top of my head. A person should avoid any food with excitotoxins in it. This includes monosodium glutimate and Aspartame (nutrasweet). Both of these wreak havoc on a person's chemical balance, and have been implicated in this type of problem. Some supplements that do seem to help are phosphatidyl choline and Omega-3 fatty acids. My adrenal glands were severely damaged by MSG, and I have to take supplements. I take evening primrose oil.

Please go to the crisis pregnancy agency near you. They can help you with the problems you are facing, including the emotional and financial ones. You can find one in your area by going here:

www.pregnancycenters.org

You are a lot stronger than you think! We will be praying for you. If you don't want an abortion, don't have one! Abortion is dangerous. It can kill you or make you into an invalid so you can't care for your other children. Not only that, but it could tear your marriage apart. That often happens. Think about how you'll feel if you know you destroyed the product of your love! Your stepdaughter can help around the house, and it will be good for her. It will teach her survival skills and build her character. Your baby is depending on you for your protection. Please protect your baby!

We will be here for you all the way. We love all of you. Keep in touch, and come here whenever you need to talk.

Hugs,
Pat

[> Subject:

Re: Broken Hearted

Author:
Melanie
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Date Posted: 10/11/07 3:19pm

Hi Kay,

I am sorry to hear that you are going through such a tough time.

I am just wondering, since you posted here, if you really want to have an abortion or if you were looking for a way out. While it certainly is your choice, you really can explore other options. It is one thing to be "prochoice" and another to feel like you don't really have one. But the truth is, it is a feeling and the choice really is still there.

Sometimes there are community resources that can help, especially with medical. If you would like help locating them, I am more than willing to help you try. There are Crisis Pregnancy Centers that often offer help with baby/maternity things, and referrals to resources as well.

Things don't always stay as they are, the kids grow up, and there are people you can meet along the way to help. There are alternatives. I can't promise it will make life easy, but I've been in pretty financially slim circumstances and they change often. There are always times of plenty and struggling in that realm for most of us. But you can get through them. If I can help you in that regard, let me know and I will do whatever I can.

--Melanie

[> Subject: Re: Broken Hearted
Author: Shellie [ Edit \| View ]	Date Posted: 10/16/07 8:55am Hi Kay, Thanks for posting here. I was wondering if you're still checking the board? If so, let me know. I'd be happy to share my thoughts with you. In the meantime, you'll be in my prayers. Take care, Shellie