| Subject: May a stranger butt in? |
Author:
Dave
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Date Posted: 18:05:39 03/15/02 Fri
In reply to:
Brandy
's message, "Re:prayer request" on 05:42:16 03/04/02 Mon
Brandy:
If I may, as a stranger to you, offer some thoughts on drinking and your marriage:
Re drinking: I'm alcoholic, dry one day at a time since May 21, 1987, and I'm very glad to be alive. Really, it was close. I can't say it's a sin for you to drink, but I can never say to anyone that it's OK; it nearly got me and I know how insidious it is, how dangerous and deceptive. You mentioned a history of heavy stuff, so keep in mind that you have weaknesses in that direction... and never forget how deceptive alcohol is. Good luck!!!
Re your wedding: I'm a father and a relatively new husband, so I been there both sides :-).
One of my daughters married someone I am leery of. I wish she had talked with me honestly as father and daughter before she did it. It probably wouldn't have changed her mind, but it would have made better the relationship between us... and maybe even the relationship between her and the man who is now her husband. Lots and lots of times, when the parents don't like something, they may have a point; you might go ahead, but understanding their point may help you. My daughter is making the best of a couple of things I might have been able to warn her about or help her with. She's doing OK, far as I can see, but it might have been better.
So, I would say go and have a mother-daughter talk, and LISTEN to her. She has to understand you will make the choice (that's VERY hard for a parent, but vital); but you have to understand that, even if you disagree, there will be a certain wisdom in what your mother has to say and you really need to respect it. And let her know you care. I hope your relationship with her will come back to love.
Good luck BOTH ways.
In faith, Dave
dave@christos.cjb.net
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