Re: Yes,pigs really can fly? -- The Crypt of Buffy's vampire

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Date Posted: 15:59:04 04/11/04 Sun
Author: Ralph Hamilton
Subject: Re: Yes,pigs really can fly?
In reply to: Shelley 's message, "Yes,pigs really can fly" on 13:53:23 04/11/04 Sun

No Shelley,
the laws of Physics will not allow pigs to fly.

Take a 200kg (450lb) porker for instance. It would require wings twenty feet long, and two feet wide, to provide enough lift to support the weight. The pig would need pectoral muscles six feet thick, to flap these wings. Once it got off the ground, the existing tail would not provide sufficient directional stability, to enable the pig to fly reliably in any direction.

So we have a design problem. The present seletal structure,would not support the huge pectorals necessary,to provide the requisite amount of thrust, to get the pig airborne. Therefore we have to redesign the skeleton and the tail. Also,the heat generated by these huge pectoral muscles,would have to be dissipated. So we also need an inbuilt cooling system, with some external heat-exchangers.

Unfortunately with all these additional fittings, the pig would once again become too heavy to fly. We could add Jet Assisted Take Off Bottles to the main body structure. to get it off the ground. I however favour a skeletal redesign, to a honeycomb bone structure, with a hard outer skin. This should cut the weight by half.

Then we could make the main body structure more tapered, for sound aerodynamic reasons. Then the outer covering something slippery, like slightly oily feathers would be ideal.

So, by now, we should have the weight down to about 150lbs. Thus, we would no longer need 6 foot thick pectoral muscles. The cooling system would be redundant also. By now, the Flying-Pig, with two inch thick pectorals, and a ten foot wingspan with a gross weight of thiry pounds, fully fuelled and ready to fly.

To sum up. Our prototype Flying-Pig. It is tapered, with a feather coating. It has a honeycomb skkeletal structure V shaped from top to lower surface. It has a large fan shaped tail, for inflight manoeuverabilty. It ways about thirty pounds with a tenfoot wingspan.

Aw fuck! I've invented an Eagle.

Regards......Ralph.

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Replies:

Re:Correction. -- Ralph Hamilton, 16:09:07 04/11/04 Sun