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Date Posted: 12:21:16 05/31/02 Fri
Author: Kaika no Miko
Author Host/IP: h00036d1bacf5.ne.client2.attbi.com / 24.128.90.17
Subject: Re: A story for children (first attempt, please comment good or bad)
In reply to: Raphaela 's message, "Re: A story for children (first attempt, please comment good or bad)" on 15:04:09 05/20/02 Mon

>Well Gem I have read this through a couple of times
>now - i didn't want to read hurriedly and leave a
>quick comment. Have you changed it from the original
>that I first saw? The language seems more accessible
>so if you haven't amended it, perhaps I am more awake
>and in tune now.
>
>I really enjoyed it - and I mean that sincerely. It
>was well written, enough suspense to engage the
>reader, fantasy to appeal to the younger audience - a
>real delight!
>
>This could evolve into a whole series of shorts linked
>into one long novel with his time travel journies -
>what do you think?
>
>Excellent my friend.
>
>Raphaela

I thought it was good. I'd love to see how you explain his abilities. Maybe he'll meet up with his friend again.

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