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Date Posted: 08:47:48 05/05/02 Sun
Author: Cari
Subject: Survivor

As the end approaches the producers are starting to run short on story lines and the contestants have all done their best schtick, so whining is the only thing left on the plate.

Seven emaciated souls struggle to generate enough enthusiasm to maintain their alliannces. Paschal sums it up for all when he says he hates this place, they all smell, they're all dirty, the food's lousy, the bugs are vicious, their tired, hungry and irritable. But when Jeff asks for a show of hands for those who want to leave, not a soul volunteers. I guess they thought Survivor was going to be a test of who could order from memory at the Ritz Carlton!

Vecepia has a birthday with a cake of banana and mango. She misses her husband, her home, her friends - she misses everything except Peter and Sarah. Sean tries to cheer her up with a big hug, but just the memory of a man's arms around her is too much - the tears flow. Sean says - don't you worry V baby, you just keep voting with me and you'll be back with your husband in no time!

The reward challenge goes to pappy who shows that 57 years old means nothing when there's a bath, clean clothes and food to be had. I guess he really was miserable! He takes Neleh with him so he can pretend that he's on a relaxing vacation with one of his daughters. After a sumptuous meal on Jeff Probst's credit card, Paschal generously tells the waiter to add a $200 tip!

Back at the camp, the other inmates ask for every detail and then as their stomachs growl and their mouths water, they wish they hadn't. Because Sean has learned so well how to be happy for others in their good fortune, he starts to whine about Neleh getting a chance to clean up and have a big feast. Gee, when was it he had his feast?

As he and the others lay leisurely about, Sean comments on how Neleh seems to be laying about. When she is ask to do something and joyfully complies, Kathy comments on how her helpfulness is all a show. Tell me again how these people just love her goofiness and that's why they haven't voted her out. Why are they keeping her exactly, oh that's right, she sucks in the immunity competitions!

Robert figures if he catches a pig, he'll insure his position in the tribe. Hmmmmm, wouldn't they want to dump the biggest eater as soon as they had a chance at some real food? Tammy helps him set a snare, because it's something to do. She knows darn well, nothing is going to get either one of them a place in the finals. No way will they win, not with this crowd doing the voting!

The immunity challenge is one of those obligatory fire-making deals. This one has popcorn and sparklers in it. Geez, you knew they had to do something to make us think it was an original idea! Robert wins and tells Tammy she's not leaving if he has any thing to do with it. Then he makes sure he has nothing to do with it!

The tribal coumcil is not a surprise. Tammy is out. She was the only true strong competitor left. Now it's a race to see who's the least weak. But then knowing they have wimps left in the running, maybe they'll go mental next. Wait a minute, other than Paschal, there aren't any heavy thinkers either.

This is one of the most unpredictable survivors, but it is not somehow, survival of the fittest. I knew we'd disprove Darwin's theory one of these days!

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