Dailey Horoscope - 6/6/02 - witha touch of humor -- RealityFans

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Date Posted: 02:52:41 06/06/02 Thu
Author: Cari
Subject: Dailey Horoscope - 6/6/02 - witha touch of humor

Aries (March 21 - April 19)

Today you will seek out new life, and new civilizations. You won't find any, of course, but you will discover a really excellent Chinese restaurant in the process.

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

Remember that those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Normally that's not a big deal, but since your accounting department just changed its name to "The Mongol Horde", you might take notice.

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

Someone will dash up to you today, say "meep meep! bthpblthpblthp!", and then dash off. At least now you'll know how to spell it.

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)

Good day to be callously indifferent to the plight of the masses. You have larger things on your mind than whether the peasants are happy. Oui?

Leo (July 23 - August 22)

Today you will notice yet another large freshly-dug mound of dirt in your neighbor's back yard. It's probably nothing -- he probably just digs at night if he can't get to sleep. I know I do.

Virgo (August 23 - September 22)

You will receive a "Dear John" letter from a loved one today, but much to your relief, your name isn't "John".

Libra (September 22 - October 22)

Someone will ask "How are you?" for the millionth time. You should celebrate the occasion by having a speech prepared - something embarassingly intimate is usually best. "Glad you asked, Bob. I'm having a darned tough time getting rid of these pesky genital warts, for one thing..."

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)

Today is an especially bad day to try something new involving explosives. Try to keep a low profile.

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)

You will meet a tough challenge in a very resourceful way, today, using only a Swiss Army Knife, a transistor radio, and oven cleaner.

Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)

Excellent day to act childish. For example, when's the last time you ordered a drink with a straw, and blew bubbles in it? Or you could pout, if you want. (Be sure to go for good lip extension, though).

Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)

You will discover a large black obelisk out on the lawn today, which obviously weighs several tons. You will be amazed at the effort some people put into a practical joke.

Pisces (February 19 - March 20)

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