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Date Posted: 22:40:53 10/13/02 Sun
Author: Spin
Subject: Chapter twenty-six (b)
In reply to: Spin 's message, "Revelation" on 22:34:06 05/20/02 Mon

His body began to tremble as he listened to Sara’s heartless words. His vision soon blurred and he quickly lowered his head. He had never felt so empty and despondent. Not even Irons were able to make him feel this way. He swallowed the lump in his throat.

‘Perhaps she’s right. There will never be an ‘us’.’ Ian thought disheartened

“By the way did you get a good eyeful when Irons sent you to watch us?” Sara was still angry and her tirade continued.

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” Ian’s voice was void of any emotion as he spoke.

“I know Irons sent you to watch over John and me while we were together.”

“If you are implying that I stood at your fire escape and watched while you two consummated your… love for each other. Then you are mistaken.”

It was true Ian never observed the two together in bed. Sara did deserve her privacy and the fact that it was just too painful for Ian to watch. Wasn’t it bad enough he could feel her with him. To feel every pleasing touch, and hear every endearment. To know and feel that it wasn’t him above her bringing her to the heights of passion. Encircled in each other’s arms as they fall together from sexual bliss.

That first time Ian had stayed back at the church. He stood alone in the cold night air. While being consumed by sensations that were both incredibly satisfying and terrifyingly painful. Terrifying because the feeling was so foreign to him. Until finally, as it ended, he soon realized what had transpired between the two. Too overwhelmed he stayed at that church for hours until Sara had arrived to face that imposter, Del Torro.

“I don’t believe you.” Sara’s voice broke through his thoughts.

“I would never intrude on such privacy, Sara.” He exclaimed.

“Never stopped you before.”

“Then you would just have to take my word for it and trust me.”

“Me trust you?” Sara snorted at the idea.

“I am the one person you can trust, Sara.”

“Trust you? How can I trust a man you can’t even protect himself against his master.”

Ian looked up from his bowed head. Confusion was written all over his face.

“Do you want to know what the blade was showing me while were stuck in that elevator?”

Ian remained silent.

“You getting your ass beat by Irons. And not once did you make an attempt to defend yourself. You stood there and willing accepted it.” Sara, already standing so close to Ian, placed her hand under his chin. She lifted his face, turning it until she could see the dark bruise on his face. She let got of his chin and with the same hand gently traced the bruise with her fingers. His eyes never left her face. He could see pity and anger in those green eyes.

“What makes you think I can trust you? How do I know that if a situation ever arose between Irons and me you won’t choose his side? That you won’t abandon me. I’m not going to take that chance.”

…. Just ask, Sara. We can be inseparable….

“Sara…” She laid a finger on his lips and stopped him from saying anything else.

“No, Nottingham. I can’t trust you. I won’t.” Sara took the ring and handed it back to him. She stepped back to lean against the couch.

“Sara…” She bowed her head and cut him off.

“Just leave Nottingham”

Ian made his way to the flight of stairs leading down to the apartment door. He placed the ring on the banister while he donned his wet coat and watch cap. He picked up the ring and looked at it. He had never been apart from it up until now and Ian always felt that the ring itself was a part of him. He glanced back at Sara. She hadn’t move from her spot her back was facing him. All he had hoped for gone. He took a deep breath and exhaled. Ian wanted to leave a part of himself behind. So he placed the ring back on the banister.

“Good-bye, Det. Pezzini.” His voice filled with sadness. Silently Ian made his way down the stairs and out the door.

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