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Subject: kliru n bntu

Author:
mawar (sedey)

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Date Posted: 07:15:12 01/13/10 Wed

salam...tak tau mcmna nak sy luahkan, sy bntu. 5 tahn yg lalu sy pnh dtnglkn kkasih..alasanya sy x pndai menghargai ksh syg lntaran skap sy yg sukr cmbru..sy sdh yg tramat.hnya than yg tau..bdosakah sy krana tlalu mncntai n mmpercayai..rsanya tak ingn lagi utk mncntai..

tp, tkdr tntukan sgalanya, stahun lalu sy bkenalan dgn 1 lelki yg sy kra tlalu smpurna dlm hti sy..yg mmahami n sd brkngsi ska dka, sy tau sy khilaf krn mnuasia mn mgkn ada yg smprna.

sgalanya baik n mbahagiakan tp panas yg sy kra hnga ke ptg, rupanya taufan yg dtg..dgn ttba sj dtngalkan tnpa sbarang alasan..mgapa? knapa? puas sy brfikr n btnya..nmun xda jawapan y sy trima..sy mndesak n mmnta jwapan kpda sgala prsoalan...sy mngandaikan dia tlh mnemui cnta br..n sy nkad sy xkn bsedh andai itu bhagia btnya..tp apa y mmbuatkan sy kliru..bntu...dia xda yg lain slain sy, e2 dbktikan temn2 y mngenali sy n dia..akhrnya dia bterus trang, mgkn krana x tenang slalu d dsak sy..dia mgakui bhawa ada ktika dia tlalu mncntai n mrndui sy, meningnkan sy...tp ada ktika sebaliknya..pndek kata cnta n prasaan dia pd sy bermusim..ada psang surtnya..hingakan brkali dia ingin mmbuang sy dlm ht dlm hdupnya...pnt sy mnangis n mrayu..namun...hatinya x pnya rsa...sy dbiarkan sj..

hingakan bermnggu dia x hbngi sy walau skadar dngan 1 msg..msg2 sy x dbalas n pngilan sy dpndang sepi..dan dia akan kmbali menelefon n mncari sy disaat di mrasa ada cnta n rndu bt sy...sy hnya mnusia biasa, pnya prasaan tluka n kcewa..mgapa mst sy dilayan bgini oleh dia..tertekan sy dibuatnnya..
tlngla sy apa hrus sy buat? sy tlalu mncntainya..krana dia tlalu bnyak mgajar sy apa e2 cnta sesma mnusia n cnt pd yg mha Esa..walau kbahagiaan ant sy n dia x lm, tp sy lbh skar mlupakn dia brbnding xboy sy..sy cba mlupakn dia tp...nthlah...smakn ingin dlupa smkin kuat ingatn sy pdnya..apa sbnarnya prasaan dia pd sy? sy kliru bntu....bleng.....tlongla apa hrus sy lakukan utk leraikan kust fkiran sy ini n skaligus mlupakan dia...krana cnta yg sy beri x u dsakiti......

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