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Date Posted: 12:30:02 07/31/01 Tue
Author: SM78
Subject: Re: Lord, Man
In reply to: Betsy 's message, "Lord, Man" on 11:31:02 07/31/01 Tue

I have far more to offer, Betsy. I was merely giving a thumbnail of my framework. I have no idea of your pathology. I have no idea of its biological or psychological basis. Depression is a disease that has many routes. I wonder if yours is irreversible in the sense of neurological "kindling."

My basic premise is that I am fucked up and will be for my entire life. However, there is humor and the joy of creativity at times. Essentially, I am a high functioning, creative person as it sounds like you once were and this
necessarily entails more than the usual drama and stress as you well know.

Personally, I don't want to throw anything in your face. I have no investment in converting you to anything. If you wish to be shrill or contrary then you can go fuck yourself. I don't have time for malicious cunts with an attitude. Really, I don't care. You have the disease of unrequited specialness which is the collapse of meaning and its concomitant depression. I have no cause in the matter and yet you come here acting as if we are somehow implicated in your pain, as if we are the cyber analogs of the people who hurt your. You really can't stand people who are smarter than you, and so you hate us.

You are blatantly passive-aggressive. You display a thinly veiled contempt for us as you flaunt your depression and former states of glory as the glorious wounds we will never have or understand. It is as if you have concluded that yours is the only possible outcome in life and we are fools for not seeing that if you cannot achieve enlightenment then no one can.

The contempt you exhibit towards me in particular has been noted. If you want a flame war with me, fine. I find myself in a dark mood and have no paitence for a failed Cinderella with a massive, angry ego. If you need to unleash your anger then go right ahead. Let's see how good you really are.

The Sinner-Man always likes a knock down drag-out, especially with some washed-up kook. I'll have you babbling in a few days and running to your psych for Haldol because I have already read your mind. You are every woman I never called back because you represent such a huge, high maintenance liability.

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