As Skylar Thomas? -- Gladiator Wrestling Alliance

[ Show ]

Support VoyForums

[ Shrink ]

VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

( How do you define the world Lunatic?.. Well, I cant really say without looking it up in a dictionary.. But I believe that there would be a big fold out picture of Chris Carpenter right next to the word with his eyes wide open and busted wide open.. Why, you might ask?.. Well because after losing to Julius Styker last week Carpenter went totally insane and is probably still right now a lunatic just from a loss, the first loss here in the Gladiator Wrestling Association. So I guess it's bigger for him then for all of the millions and millions of Canadian Iconoholics that witnessed the loss world-wide via their television set. Although Carpenter is now an "enraged lunatic", it might be for his own benefit. Being that his calm down to earth approach to wrestling was well utterly boring and left his lifeless, this lunatic thing he has going just might be the thing that takes him to the next level. In fact it just might be what he needs to get himself a win over the infamous GWA superstar, Skylar Thomas. Yeah, Skylar may have allready have had previous success in the GWA, but Carpenter's career here in the GWA is young and he has plenty of time to accomplish that of what Skylar has accomplished plus a bunch more. The bunch more because, well, he's easily known as a "bunch better then Skylar Thomas". Because Skylar Thomas is'nt better then anyone here in the GWA, eacspecially males. Because the poor bastard cant defeat a female in Stacy Lynn Jordan, what makes him think that he can go head to head, mono E. mono with the single greatest wrestler of the twenty-first century?.. Is it that he is insane, and just does'nt know any better?.. Or is it because Rellan Shard, the guy whom Carpenter has allready beaten twice, beat his head in worse then how bad it was when he was born. Quite frankly I dont know, and I dont want to know. But, I know for sure that Chris Carpenter vs. Skylar Thomas in Insurrections Main Event on Wendsaday.. Well, it will be one hell of a battle.. But we all know who will come out on top, and if you said Skylar Thomas.. Then well your either imbred, insane, drunk, high, or a member of the musical group Hanson.Watch GWA Insurrection onWendsday to see who will come out victorious?..Will it be the idiot whois inferior to a female?.. Nahhh!... It will be da man, da icon, da myth, da Legend.. "The Canadian Icon" Chris Carpenter!)

{ The camera opens to a outside shot of the large and illustrious mansion of one, Chris Carpenter. The sun is rising just over the top of the mansion with a grey colored and orange colored sky. The camera closes up on the white and gold mansion showing the initials "CC" in fancy gold writing in the smack dab middle of the mansions front wall. The camera fades to what is believed to be inside of the mansion in the living room area. The big screen television is on a commercial but the volume is all the way down. The camera spans around the room showing a figure laying down comfortably on the blue leather couch. The camera closes up on the person showing that it is indeed Chris Carpenter!.. Carpenter is laying with his head twords the television but with his eyes closed and his head on a pillow with a fluffy white pillow case. He is wearing a pair of black kind of small sweat-pants, and no shirt. Carpenter seems to be sleeping, and then it is known he is sleeping when he inhales in makin a loud snoring sound that is so disgusting sounding it makes you almost want to hurl, or if you are really disgusted by it, just hurl on the spot. Suddenly a loud pounding noise is heard then yelling is heard from off the camera as the pounding sound continues to be heard.}

{ Whomever it is outside bangs on the door a few times then makes a hugly loud sigh that is heard although they seem to be outside wanting in. }

{ The unknown door hitter is now known as the world-wide loved knuckle-head, Scotty Williams.. Scotty pounds on the door a few times then Carpenter's eyes abruptly open as he looks around still laying on his side as his body is motionless. }

{ Carpenter sighs realizing that Scotty is causing the rutkiss that is keeping him from sleeping, he turns over making his head face the back of the couch as he shakes his head.}

{ Carpenter lies their motionless for a few second untill Scotty begins to pound harder then before on the door three times very loud. Carpenter lets out a angered moan as he sits upright and rubs his eyes, probably being he is having a hangover from drinking too much the night before. He sits there with his face in his hands, tired as hell. }

Scotty Williams(From off Camera): Come on man! It's f*ckin' cold out here! LET ME IN!

Scotty Williams(From off Camera): I just wanted to let you know that your no longer facing Skylar Thomas and Lost Worlds in a no disqualification triple threat match..

Canadian Icon:{ Shakes his head with his head still in his hands. } Damn, I was looking forward to that..

Scotty Williams(From off Camera): Now your just fighting Skylar Thomas in the Main Event with no disqualification..

Canadian Icon:{ Brings his head out of his hands and smiles speaking softly } Skylar Thomas, eh?... God damn, it must suck to be him..

{ Carpenter shakes his head and lips the words "Skylar Thomas" as he lies back down with a large grin across his face, a happy grin that is. Scotty bangs on the door a few times as Carpenter closes his eyes and places his pillow over top of his head so that he cannot hear the noise in which Scotty Williams is making by pounding on the door. Carpenter slowly falls to a deep sleep.. }

{ Carpenter's dream opens in a large bedroom with alot of purple and black stuff. Not to mention a huge rainbow painted on the far wall, which is purple. In the middle of the room is a large bed which has vails from it with a canopy on it which is, you guessed right, purple!..On the bed which has purple colored sheets, a purple comforter, and purple pillows lays an old looking battered man... The man is badly shaved with hair going this way and that, he has medium length sandy blonde hair which is going every which way and looks as if it has'nt had a comb ran through it for several days.. The man looks, looks, he looks exactly like "The Assassin" Skylar Thomas! The only difference is that the man looks a bit heavier then the acctual Skylat Thomas.... The man is wearing a pair of purple silk pajama bottoms and a very tight white t-shirt which reads "I'm Stupid" in plain black lettering. The man tosses and turns on the very large, probably King size bed.. He suddenly opens his eyes rising to a seated position in the bed.. His eyes are wide open and he looks as if he had just seen the devil himself. He sits there breathing heavily and staring wide eyed. He stops staring and spans the room, looking at it as if he had never seen it before. }

{ The man looks around the room noticing all the purple and all the rainbows.. He then looks down at himself and notices he is wearing one of the biggest numskal on gods green earths t-shirts, Scotty Williams!.. He makes a very shocked sound and expression seeing it then looks even more shocked noticing how small his arms are and how flabby he gut is.}

Canadian Icon: Wait a second, wait a gosh darn second.. Did I die and go to hell or something!?

{ The man looks at himself and takes the "I'm Stupid" t-shirt off tossing it over to the left of him to the ground. He looks at his flabby gut and smacks it making it move very much in all directions. He shakes his head then puts his arm up in the air in the flexing position and trys to flex but no difference is made, his arms are just still flabby and with no muscle tone whatsoever. He shakes his head then notices something odd, he quickly places bolth of his hands on top of his head noticing long hair.. The men gasps with a very shocked and disturbed look on his face..}

{ The man is now known and looks alot like Skylar Thomas but is acctually who Carpenter believes to be himself in this dream sequence. He quickly does a roll off the bed and jumps to his feet racing over a nearby standing size mirror which is parrallel to the far wall. He looks at it and shakes his head with wide eyes, not believing what he is seeing..}

Canadian Icon: F*ck no, Ohhh f*ck no!.. What did I deserve to be lowered to a peice of skum like Skylar?..{ Looks up at the ceiling as if he was talking to god } Huh, big guy?.. Answer my question, I want a god damn answer.. Because well, this f*cking sucks!

{ Carpenter pokes his stomach as it once again races in waves of fat going every which way.. He makes a whining sound then shakes his head still looking at the mirror.. }

Canadian Icon: Big man, you could've at least made me like.. Tom Arnold, or Dan Ackroid, or someone whose in better physical health then Skylar.. Not to mention better looking and more appealing to women then that b*tch, Thomas..

{ Carpenter looks at himself in the mirror for a few more second not believing what is happening, untill suddenly a loud knock is heard. Three consecutive hard knocks that is. Carpenter quickly turns his head to where the door is on the other side of the room. He hesitates then yells. }

{ A slight hesitation from whomever is behind the loud knocking on the door then words are heard. }

{ Carpenter lips the word "Selia" to himself trying to figure out what she is talking about, then nods remembering that Skylat Thomas' sisters name is Celia. Carpenter has a funny look as he looks back twords the door..}

{ The door opens as whomever is on the other side twists the handle and pulls it back.. In walks a tall, slender woman.. She has a light face and looks sickingly thin.. She has long strait dirty blonde hair and is wearing enough make-up to make an elephants a** to look as attractive as Britney Spears.. She looks decent with all that make-up on and is wearing a pair of tight Capri blue jeans, a tight blue tube top, and a pair of brown sandals.. She smiles seeing Carpenter stand there..}

Selia Thomas:{ Giggles girlishly } Oh, Skylar.. You crack me up, you really do!

{ Carpenter makes a weird face on his fat Skylar Thomas body look-a-like.. He shakes his head as he sighs then puts his fingers through his hair looking down at the floor as he slowly sits down on the side of the large bed. }

{ Carpenter looks up and takes his head out of his hands, and notices the very large grin that is on the face of Selia.. He looks at her with a disgusted look on his face..}

{ Selia makes a very mad expression apon her face and starts turning red as Carpenter sits there on the bed thinking. As he realizes that he is in the body of Skylar Thomas, he shakes his head and smiles at Selia..}

Canadian Icon: Just kidding, just kidding.. I mean it has'nt even been very long since the last time..

Selia Thomas:{ Face goes from a frown to a smile } Just four hours ago.. You were flat out INCREDIBLE!

Canadian Icon:{ Hides the disgusted look that is deep down inside of him } Like they say, insests the best..

{ Selia smiles at who she believes to be her brother then walks twords the door. She reaches the open door and looks back at Carpenter smiling. }

Selia Thomas: I'm going to go slip into something more comfortable.. I'll be right back..

{ Selia giggles as she walks away and out of the camera view, as she is out of view Carpenter starts coughing and laughing his a** off.. I mean, he always said that Celia and Skylar had insest.. But it's truley true!.. Carpenter has to be astonished!..}

Canadian Icon:{ Still laughing a bit } Oh my.. Oh my!....{ Stops laughing realizing she is going to be back in a few minutes. } Wait a gosh darn second, I got to get out of here!.. Otherwise.... { Looks as if he is about to die } I will have to have sex with SELIA THOMAS!.. YUCKY, YUCKY, YUCKY!..

{ Carpenter has a look on his face as if he had just inhaled some air in which a skunk spraid their stinky stuff in.. He quickly stands up from the bed and paces to the doorway where he exits the room full of purple and rainbows.. He walks into a hallway in which the sides are painted sky colored and have many various pictures on the wall of children in which Carpenter has never seen in his life.. He quickly paces down the long hall which has many doors leading off to differ'nt rooms.. He approaches a set of steps and quickly steps down them skipping every other step.. At the bottom of the steps is a large dining room with a huge long table with plates on them ready for a lunch or supper, or something in that nature.. Carpenter scurries to the table looking for the food because of his huge hunger, but notices that no food is there and lips the word "f*ck".. He then quickly paces around the table and accidentally runs into a short, fat man in a chef suit.. The man looks very italian and has curly black hair and a black mustache.. He sort of looks like Mario from Super Mario Brothers, you know the Nintendo game..The chef looks at Carpenter with a weird expression..}

Canadian Icon:{ Carpenter looks around then realizes that he was talking to him being that he "is" Skylar. } Sorry, what did you say?

Canadian Icon: Well, I just figured that I would go for a drive in my Ram, having a very stressfull morning..

Chef: Morning?.. It's a like four o'clock.. And what are you a talking about?.. A Ram?..

Canadian Icon: Me not have enough money?.. Pshh!.. I am rich beyond my wildest dreams.. I dont understand what your talking about..

Chef: Well a anyways.. I'm making your a supper.. So be a back by a five o'clock.. Okay?

{ Carpenter quickly walks away from the Chef and opens up a large door with a oval shaped window that is about the length of the whole door he opens it up and looks back at the Chef and waves..}

{ Carpenter smiles then turns and walks outside onto a small porch which is painted pure white.. He looks at the bare small porch then looks outside where it is chilly and leaves are seen and heard blowing ever which way.. Carpenter looks at the street and see's a small Station Wagon sitting in right in front of the house.. He looks at it and laughs..}

{ Carpenter shakes his head then notices the Wagon bouncing up and down.. He smiles thinking that a few kids are "getting it on" in the car, so he stands up and slowly walks on the sidewalk to the car.. He walks up to the window as the bouncing gets bigger and bigger.. Carpenter looks knocks on the window not being able to see anything in the window.. Suddenly the front passenger side door quickly flys open.. Out pops the heads of Zach Hanson, Taylor Hanson, and Isaac Hanson.. They all have sweat pouring down their foreheads and have large smiles across their faces.. They look at Carpenter who in the body of Skylar Thomas has a large disgusting look apon his face..}

{ Chris Carpenter is lying on the blue leather couch with a white pillow over his head.. He is wearing a pair of old beaten up sweat-pants and no shirt.. He suddenly starts yelling and kicking his feet..}

{ Carpenter throws the pillow off of him and rises to an upright position on the couch breathing heavily with his eyes wide open from shock.. He sits there panting heavily..}

Canadian Icon: Hanson?.. Hanson?...Skylar Thomas?.. Oh my! Thank god it was a dream!.. Thank f*cking god!.... If hell was half as bad as that is then I better start saying my prayers so that I dont get stuck being in the backseat in the body of Skylar Thomas' fat a** with the members of Hanson!.. YUCKY!... Or having sex with Selia Thomas, that's about as bad as with a guy!..Just purly disgusting, truly.. Wait a second, why am I talking to myself?

Scotty Williams(From off Camera): Carp?.. Carp?.. Are you finally up?.. It's f*ckin' nine o'clock.. I have been waiting for you for three hours to wake up..

{ Carpenter looks around for a few seconds then realizes that if he speaks then Scotty will know that he is here.. Carpenter shakes his head grinning then grabs his pillow and lays back down on the couch and smiles closing his eyes..}

Scotty Williams(From off Camera): Carp?.. I could've sworn I just heard you talking..

{ The dream opens as Carpenter is seen sitting in a hot tub.. But not just any hot tub, one filled with a bunch of women in tiny bikinis... Carpenter is sitting with his arm around a blonde bombshell with all the right attributes, who is wearing a plain red bikini and showing alot of cleavedge.. The one on the left is a red head with a smaller chest but a nicer stomach.. She is wearing a purple suit with yellow polka dots.. Carpenter has his arms around the two and the blonde is holding Carpenter's Bud Light in her right hand.. Carpenter has a Cuban Cigar in his mouth and is wearing a pair of red nike swimming trunks.. He smiles looking around him at the six beautiful women..}

{ Carpenter takes his cigar out of his hand then reaches for the beer but the blonde pulls it away.. She shoves the can between her two breasts and smiles at Carpenter giggling..}

{ Carpenter smiles vastly as he looks at the hot blondes enourmous knockers and his beer inbetween them.. He smiles then makes a few happy sounds which are pretty much gibberish then turns to the blonde who is also looking very happy and well, horny..}