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Subject: HEY RHONDA!!! I've Got A Bone To Pick

Author:
Jimmy

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Date Posted: 19:12:07 12/18/07 Tue
Author Host/IP: c-71-197-21-7.hsd1.mi.comcast.net/71.197.21.7

Perhaps you have yet to grasp the complex personality that is me. I thought I've been more than clear as to the effect of my mood during alternating equinoxes over the past nine years; and Missy...this is the Fall. My Augustan age!" Henry Adams might say; or would he? At any rate, Gore Vidal would have us believe so and I'm a fan of Gore Vidal's.

Which brings me to the first point in my rebuttal to your terse indictment--that kinda hurt my feelings (but don't feel bad because it was only the remorse that always accompanies the hangover...it's just now, FINALLY, I realize even Super Jimmy is not immune to a hangover). I am not a bigot. I could have politely emailed you and requested that you wipe those comments; but I had to say them. See, I feel that that word is being used as a mechanism to keep rank-and-file whites (like all of us here) guilty and not the good kind. We all know this; but do we all 'feel' this? I finally do. Secondly, I will make a GREAT FATHER!!! Normally, I'd assume you were either kidding OR trying to spur me on through manipulation (impossible to do by the way; I'm too paranoid and insecure to ever let anyone manipulate me.) but since you went out of your way to stress your earnestness (I believe something along the lines of "Umm-hmm, I said it..." as you crinkled your face and snapped your fingers twice in the air before finishing with a "pisshhhh") I must spend the latter part of this vindictive tirade exigenciously extenuating my innate 'and' indoctrinated traits that make me a good Father. To disagree, makes you anti-Catholic.

I will come back to that more important point shortly but first, due to the age in which we live, I must first defend the callousness of my remarks. One is compelled to do so in a day and age when such epithets are turned into epitaths.

The roots of this paralysis were destroyed forever when Kramer delivered his harangue. Was anything he said false? Think about it. Whites stopped using that word because they were taught to feel guilty about their advantages. Eventually, a sense of pride in the intimidation and subsequential beatings whites took from blacks conflated its origins.

Having said that, there are two reasons I do not say that word and the predominant one is that I don't ever want to hurt somebody's feelings. That's just a fact. Secondly, I do not want to get shot...or worse yet, my ass kicked, or worse 'even' yet Punked out. And that would surely be the case for the guilt of being in the wrong would not allow me to channel the austere glory I summon when it's time to fight.*

Irregardless, we've all been encapsulated into a world where origins mean nothing and those that chase them down are subject to Larry Davidian anecdotes of false assumptions. Oh well, that's the world at the surface that we live in. Ironic that the deep end is not dangerous after all. They'll ram your head into the cement of the shallow end.

In closing this first point, I'd like to praise Richards for having the BALLS to say what MILLIONS of whites also believe in private. Exacerbating that point, Richards did it in public, and as a public figure, in an aegis dominated by YouTube.

Richard's tirade would have been long forgotten--and his obit scarred with his outbursts serving as the lead--had it not been for the entrapment of Dog. I feel very prescient about this. If we can't say whatever we want in the PRIVACY of our own home then this country is fucked. The anti-stystem climb of this particular group has far exceeded their two-step and are the unwilling participants in a truly authoritarian quest of the Ruling Elite.

As a result of this train-of-thought finally coming to fruition along with the cause reinforcing the effect of acknowledging, GUILT-FREE, the numerous values of own-groupism within a Pluralist Democracy (dominated by an Elite Ruling Class) a few days later, with my girl, at the store I saw an Asian man. He was simply Asian. I did not feel sorry for his journey through America's festooned racism NOR did I irrationally look upon him as a threat; rather, I rationally looked upon him as a threat. This man gets no breaks at my expense NOR is he working to subvert America's Western roots (at least not consciously). He was simply a dude who knew where to turn inside a country whose constitution ensures that power is distributed into many hands and that it's wise to stick to your own.

Sadly whites today are not capable of this doublethink (the embracing of a free-market and its Alger-esque ideals promote independence on the one hand while on the other being proud of being white and furthermore, acting on it by taking care of your own, is seen--by automatic default--as brazen racism). I'd argue that most Asians understand this concept consciously (rather extra-consciously if you're diggin' my jive, Cocheese!); that Arabs (and Persians; whatever) thrive on an indignation that is IN YOUR FACE!!!; that blacks have a feel for what the Asian emperically comprehends and rides a steady beat intuitavely. And I mean that as a compliment but I don't care if you take it as condascending. The Hispanics are following the blacks on the surface, but the underlying base is ripped off from the Irish Catholic playbook right here in America. Is Rome still sending in the plays? At any rate, I don't like it because of all the different races in this country, this is the only one who refuses to abandon its own culture. Trouble looms.

This is the world my son (or daughter) will be (though I REALLY want a boy first!) brought into. Do I not have the right to seek these truths so that I can discern the world I am living in so as to not only ensure his or her safety but to give them the working man's advantage my dad gave me? YOU INSULTED MY FATHER!!!

So what if I punched out the windows? Did I lay a hand on her? NO! And I never would. But I am a passionate person and that is why I had her watch "Hurlyburly" with me when we first started dating. So what if I stood up to the Cops and challenged the youngest one to a fight? It's as brazen as it is calculated and I've been a calculating fuck for a long time now (though at the expense of my innocence--but YOU can have that!). Big deal so I drank a fifth of whiskey and took a legal stimulant. Did I break any laws? Hence, the unabashed rhetoric I laid on the cops when I kept repeating: "What!??? I can't get a little drunk? Take a little Speed!??? I'VE GOT A SCRIPT!"

My girl told me the next day that they thought I was hilarious. In reality, I hadn't been as bad as I thought. True, the Police were called and I was forced to leave a Thanksgiving Party that had 6-7 more hours ahead of it.

I love her family but they are a bumptious crowd. And I feel, in order to be considered bumptious you're not going to know what it means. We're just a few channels apart but that's fine because our kid will be a hybrid of that kind of Donkey Mick and my own family's penchant for lunatic outburst. Their undeniable physical prowess and our analytical skill set. Both have a passion for who they are...and where they came from. And now it's up to me to make sure where they are going.

So I hate to say this but: FUCK YOU RHONDA!!! You wanna go be an Episcopal Secular-leaning Socially Liberal, Fiscally-Conservative WASP!!! Go right ahead. But realize that not only are we all in this together--that you need us as much as we need you--but that the reason you are, all of a sudden so High-and-Mighty and can look down on the travails of the American Catholic is because of YOUR ANCESTORS who fought to get you there.

I gotta run. She just woke up. I don't want to be accused of chatting with local Goth chicks. FUCK!!! Whenever that door opens at night my stomache contracts. Am I afraid of her? HELL NO!!! But I just don't want to hear it. She demands way too much attention and I give her what I think is right. But I don't want to fight. Not right now. Because after telling YOU off I wanted to get back to Gore Vidal's "Empire."

I forgive you, Rhonda; and I accept your apology.

*I have two attitudes I ascribe to in the ugly panic before a fight. The first is Rocky/Superman Hero mode. I'm completely in the right and I must act in order to save the day (or to preserve the tenets of the Capitilist World-View I defend implicitly, sententiously, and yes, unconsciously). The second is my ugly side. The Macheavillian Jimmy whose only Machiavellian out of resentment and indignation which, for the most part, distances me from the Nihilism I'm channelling. I'm now the anti-Hero pretending to be the lunatic and I always let my opponent now that: "I've just decided to go to Hell and I'm taking you with me."

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: HEY RHONDA!!! I've Got A Bone To Pick	Jimmy	19:33:08 12/18/07 Tue
Re: HEY RHONDA!!! I've Got A Bone To Pick -- Rhonda, 16:45:27 12/19/07 Wed Brevity? -- Jimmy, 05:56:31 12/22/07 Sat