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Date Posted: 08:46:06 02/11/03 Tue
Author: Flabulas
Subject: Flab-by phone home

~The sound of a shower fills the small hotel room that Flabulas and Gad have inhabited for about a week now. Gad with his camera slowly walks though the darkened main room, panning around before centering on the bathroom. He makes his way to the door and opens it quietly, steam billows out and the camera is in. Flabulas is singing random catches of several songs as he washes himself in the shower. Gad sneaks closer and pushes the camera onto the top of the shower stall and we get to see Flabulas… from the chest up luckily, nothing you haven’t seen before. Come on guys, he doesn’t wear a shirt when he’s wrestling… get over it. He glances up, does a double take, and yells at Gad~

Flabulas – Gad, what the hell are you doing? Get that camera out of here you jackass.

~Gad laughs as he pulls the camera back out of the shower and rubs the steam off of the lens.~

Gad – You got an e-mail from your wife. She wants you to call her at home.

Flabulas – And you couldn’t have waited a few minutes, or told me through the door?

Gad – I just thought some of your female fans might want to get an eye full.

Flabulas – What the hell is wrong with you?

~The shower turns off.~

Flabulas – Gad, you’d better get the hell out of here before I count to ten, because I’m coming out then whether you’re gone or not, and I really don’t think you want to see that.

~Flabulas starts to count, by the time he gets to four, the door is closed and we’re spared the horror of seeing Flabulas naked. Several minutes later, the door opens and Flabulas walks out, a giant towel around his giant waist. He’s obviously still angry at Gad and glares at him as he sits down on one of the beds and reaches for the phone.~

Flabulas – Hello? Yes, I’d like to make an international call. Yes, to Salt Lake City, Utah, United States. Yes, the number is *BEEEEEEPPP* thank you.

~Flabulas waits as the phone rings. After about a minutes, Laura picks up the phone.~

Laura – Hello? Is that you Dallas?

Flabulas – Yeah, hey, you wanted me to call?

Laura – I just wanted to hear your voice again.

Flabulas – I just called you last night.

Laura – Well… there’s something I didn’t tell you last night. There’s been somebody hanging around the house. Somebody broke one of our windows last night and there was a note wrapped around the rock. It said, ‘The day of reckoning is nearly upon us. The day will come when you will pay for your crimes against us, and it is drawing closer.’

Flabulas – Sounds like something Egbert would write.

Laura – Which one was Egbert?

Flabulas – Remember back at the trial, the skinny guy with the acne and the square glasses? That’s Egbert. Don’t let his looks fool you, that guy’s nuts. I put him away for life though, and I know he’s not out, the FBI would have told me if he was… I want you to get on a plane and get over here right away.

Laura – Alright, I love you Dallas.

Flabulas – I love you too dear. Goodbye.

Laura – Goodbye

~Laura hangs up the phone and Flabulas looks at the receiver for a moment before putting back in the cradle.~

Flabulas – Gad, where’s my gun?

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