| Subject: Re: I thought the rollercoaster stopped....but |
Author:
Heather
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Date Posted: 20:36:40 11/20/08 Thu
In reply to:
Hulalea
's message, "Re: I thought the rollercoaster stopped....but" on 22:22:23 11/16/08 Sun
That is so hard to do! I don't love him enough anymore to want to be with him, but just thinking that my sons dad is lonely and depressed kills me. Knowing that anyone feels the pain that I have felt and do feel at times, pains me. I don't know why!
I went ahead and sent letters and pictures, but not of me, just the kids. His letters luckily don't contain any "jail house love song" that they all try to sing. He at least has a little respect. Thank God, cause right now I wouldn't want to deal with that.
I lost my job three weeks ago and it hasn't been pretty.
I am remembering when one of the girls on here lost her job and had three kids and her hubby- an addict - stopped giving her money. She must have been going through hell on earth worrying about tomorrow and hurting over her hubby.
Luckily i don't have the pains of a hubby any longer. It doesn't even cross my mind like that. Thanks to all of you who helped me through it. I am a better person because you all were here for me.
My son with Spencer is a super intelligient child. He has passed the California State tets for the gifted. He knows alot more about life than I give him credit for sometimes. He sits down and talks to me about things and suprises me.
He sat me down one day just recently and said, mom, I know that what my dad does is bad and I don't want to be like him, but I love him cause he is my dad. Please don't let us lose contact with him. I want to always know my dad no matter what. He is only 7 but this child knows what he wants when it comes to his dad. He understands the restrictions and never argues with me about them.
He doesn't want to write to him, but he asked that I do and to tell him that he loves him and misses him. So that is another reason I did. I feel ok about it. I don't feel any stress about the situation and I hope my son doesn't either. He seems fine. He is actually better than ever cause his dad is not around messing up his mind.
When he gets out, that will be a different story. We will have to deal with that when that time arrives.
I know some of you are shaking your head and so am I.
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