Re: Used again -- METH HELP FOR FAMILIES

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Subject: Re: Used again

Author:
Heather

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Date Posted: 09:22:24 07/17/06 Mon
In reply to: Shari 's message, "Re: Used again" on 23:18:22 07/16/06 Sun

The pain? Will it ever be gone? I'm sure it won't be, but once you start focusing on YOU, it will get easier to put her needs aside, because she has a choice and she chooses drugs.
What I suggest is to write a list of the things you have put off that make you happy, and start accomplishing them. Let her go, one day at a time, or one hour at a time. Remember these key words - NO and CHOICE. It helped me. Especially the list. She is in control of your life right now and she knows how to pull your strings. Get tough and teach her that you are living your life the way you want to live it just as she has chosen to live her life the way she choices. Stop doing for your addict the things she can do for herself. That is one reason she doesn't have to change. She should have went from rehab to a half way house that will make her get a job and pay for her room and board there. She has to learn all that over again because she is used to getting from others. She has to be willing to take those baby steps for her life but she isn't. So you must take control over YOU and say NO and live as best you can to make yourself happy. If she doesn't choose her life a better path, it is not your fault. Please know that.
I hope you take this advice because no matter what relationship you are to her and I am to my addict, THEY ARE STILL ADDICTS.
Love and respect,
Heather

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