Re: Shelly- I know how you are feeling -- METH HELP FOR FAMILIES

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Subject: Re: Shelly- I know how you are feeling

Author:
Heather

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Date Posted: 09:33:05 07/26/06 Wed
In reply to: Hulalea 's message, "Re: Shelly- I know how you are feeling" on 18:39:31 07/25/06 Tue

I don't know for sure. But my gut tells me that he is not using. But only him, God, and the dope dealer knows the truth. He did say he would take a hair test, then shaved his head completely, so that was really strange. But I cannot say that he isn't thinking clearer cause he is. He is more focused on his life and where it is going. I feel that he is only usng drinking to forget about the drugs and when that makes him fall he will go back to drugs.
He is still the same person I knew while using with the exception of the mood swings.
Hula - all these excuses and explanations and I got to tell you, I really don't know and I realized that I have to really learn not to worry about him. If he is using it will catch up with him again. But really it seems he is clean. He is still very selfish and self centered though. That has not changed. He is only thinking of himself.
I turned in my court papers yesterday. I had to put them down after they kept sending them back. I was wondering if God was trying to tell me soemthing and he was. I was making more of it than I needed to. I am in control of the situation because he allowed me to be in control. So I prayed about it and put it off until I had my answer. I was stressing so bad on what do I put on the papers, and I couldn't handle it anymore. I think God put Spencer back in to my life for a week so I could see what I needed to put and I feel very comfortable about it. Very comfortable. It feels good to listen to God. I had written to my old pastor and he send me a really short but deep response. Here is his response:
Keep the faith & things will right themselves if you make good choices.
We love
you & look foward to seeing everyone next April.

SO I prayed on that and God gave me my answer. It feels wonderful. I dropped the papers back off yesterday to the court house and the lady that helped me was so nice and comforting and told me that I will meet with the judge to discuss the matter and that he will not be invited because he obviously didn't want to be there or he would have responded to the papers. She said the default cases are very few and far between so the next one open is in September. I learned so much these past two weeks. Boy how come you have to fall to learn? I am glad that I did though because that pain and the stomach aches are alot easier to deal with now that I have more knowledge of the situation and I know that everything is going to be ok. I do not need to stress because Jesus, my LORD and Savior is going to make sure my kids and me are taken care of both physically and mentally. I am so happy that I feel that peace again. But this time that wondering if, when, why, what is not there. I know what I need to do from here on out. =)
I may not not know all things, but I do know that I love my children and will be there for them every step of the way as I have done always. They love me and trust me and right now that is all that matters in the world. They are so precious to me, I would not want to hurt them, I am striving to show them the best life I can.
Heather

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: Shelly- I know how you are feeling	Hulalea	16:16:20 07/26/06 Wed
Re: Shelly- I know how you are feeling -- Heather, 09:19:14 07/27/06 Thu