reply to kayla and cindy -- METH HELP FOR FAMILIES

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Subject: reply to kayla and cindy

Author:
nancy

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Date Posted: 20:32:13 03/10/06 Fri

Thank you both for your "tuff love" messages to me.......I guess I needed to hear them........and no....he didn't make his appt. today......he booked on Wed. night.. and didn't return until about 4:00 this am........I knew bloody well he wasn't going to show up there......
He has re-booked for 1:00 pm next tues.... assuming he doesn't "go for a walk" between now and then... maybe he'll go...........I don't know.......I am out of town for eleven days.. leaving that morning.. and you know what ..?? I don't bloody care anymore...........there is nothing I can do.. he will have eleven days on his own here.. by himself...............if he's not in recovery.. I always have the option to call.. but.. it's up to him to answer.. I am going through a hugely emotional ptsd trauma thing right now.. and going to house sit at my friends. about an hour away......is as good as it's going to get for me..............to get any kind of a real break.............................................
He's 27 years old........he's never brought anyone/anything into this environment...........he knows I couldn't deal with it.. in fact all his friends downtown think I live anywhere between Toronto and the Yukon...............................so.. I'm not worried on that score.................I am just very saddened that he was feeling so "unwell" that he couldn't get there today..................yeah.....like that's what's up........he wasn't ready and maybe won't be for some time.........Don't know............
Don't care...............right now I really don't.......
Thank you both for the reality check.............
And all of you for even taking the time to read my stuff.............................dumb as it is.............take care
Love and Peace
Nancy

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