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Subject: Shaun Wallis explodes

Author:
fireman

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Date Posted: 18:10:06 02/15/04 Sun

The cause of the recent Port Kembla ethanol fire has authorities baffled, however I am in a position to reveal the true source of the explosion. My wife was in Woolies the other day when she bumped into Shaun Wallis' missus struggling to push a trolley choc-a-bloc full of baked beans, it was jam packed with Watties, Heinz and even the home brand varieties. Mrs Wallis explained to my better half that the Bulls veteran front rower has taken a leaf out of Ronnie Barker's book and is on a strictly baked beans menu. For the last couple of weeks he has been religiously sticking to this diet. Residents in the leafy suburbs of Mangerton and Mt St Thomas have been complaining about a pungent odour engulfing the neighbourhood. Asthmatics and the elderly were experiencing breathing difficulties , dogs were chucking up and paint was peeling of houses. Apparently Wally has sprung a leek, with those years of heavy duty eating and the amount of time spent sitting on the shit can his sphincter is cactus. Anyway, a mate of Wally's who works at the storage depot thought he had come up with a pearler of an idea. On the particular day when the boss was away, the burly props mate shoved a pipe up Wally's arse and rigged it up to the giant ethanol storage tank.Wally sat there with his belly wobbling like a jelly on a potters wheel,sucking on paddle pops and drinking bottles of diet coke.The idea was to flush out Wally's system, I'm a big fan of lateral thinking, but these two meat axes have the combined I.Q of the temperature of a cold artic night. Normally ethanol doesn't easily ignite but combined with Wally's potent gases it spontaneously combusted, the rest as they say, is history. Shaun ran away screaming in agony as his bum hairs were in flames, talk about great balls of fire, poor old Shaun ended up in Wollongong hospital with a scorched ring.

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: Shaun Wallis explodes	Gando	16:27:58 02/22/04 Sun
Re: Shaun Wallis explodes -- Bob Jane, 18:21:42 02/24/04 Tue Re: Shaun Wallis explodes -- Col. Sanders, 16:57:40 03/10/04 Wed