VoyForums
[ Show ]
Support VoyForums
[ Shrink ]
VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: [1], 2, 3, 4 ]

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: 19:14:31 07/16/12 Mon
Author: You assholes should be able to figure it out
Subject: HA HA FUCKING HA!

HA HA! WOW! THIS BOARD IS STILL AS FUCKING FUNNY AS I REMEMBER!!

I remember back, to a golden age, filled with with wit, sarcasm, and screaming homos complaining about the witty sarcasm mocking the homos... OH. And the insensitivity. Oh yes. How the insensitivity ran wild. Leaving trampled, bloody, twitching feelings crushed in it's wake.
Nothing was sacred.

It was so offensive that every faggot from KRF to FLARF was horribly offended, and new enemies were made every day!

T'was a paradise for hate. True hate. Not this new wave of faggy ass-kissin' hate I've seen on this shitty board! Back in my day it was a real hardcore Hate! Grab a tree and hang on for dear life kinda hate! The kind of hate that made people cry real tears! Sweet tears! They were like candy to me!

Artie was filled with jealousy and bitterness at all the other old has-beens that still shuffled around the ren faire cheating on their wives and pretending they aren't 50 years old. Cough *Dan* Cough! Now all he can do is get into political arguments on facebook.

And Frank.
Frank was miserable, trapped in his horrible marriage, terrible job and boner-less life.

Well, thats the same.

Even that time at The Foxy lady, where that exotic stripper with huge tits, ground the hell out of Frank's crotch for 20 minutes.
And the best compliment she could come up with was. "I love flaccid cocks".

"Flaccid cocks, and being able to see myself dancing in your head reflection"

Then Frank cried. Ha ha ha! Sweet tears! Real tears! They were like candy to me!


And Brian!
Oh, the tremendous amount of weed Brian smoked. How it would fuck up his reality. It was hilarious. But nobody was allowed to joke about it on here, because nobody was supposed to know he smoked weed. Especially his mother. Who must think that weed-like smell was what her dear, sweet son's farts smell like. Because the house would occasionally stink of it.

That, and the smell of cum.

From his farts.

Cause he's one of them Gays.

But a gay that towered over Cliff and could eat beans off his head. Which, I assumed was some kind of gay slang for licking shit off his recently used penis tip.

You know. Cause them gays like the butt sex.

So there would be shit on it.



Shit and blood.



And Aids.


Cause them gays love the Aids.



And Cliff.

Cliff would make fun of women doing fights at ren faires.


Cause he hates women.


Cause they won't fuck him.



And The King of Hate.
He was awesome.
Every girl wanted him and every guy wanted to be him.


Then there is Paul. Who never reads this board so I guess we can say whatever we want about him.
But nobody talks about Paul anymore.

He is just an old queen that has slipped into the mists of time.


And gay hooker's assholes.



That was the golden age.

Before the dark times.

Time counts and keeps countin', and we knows now finding the trick of what's been and lost ain't no easy ride. But that's our trek, we gotta' travel it. And there ain't nobody knows where it's gonna' lead. Still in all, every night we does the tell, so that we 'member who we was and where we came from... but most of all we 'members the man that finded us, him that came the salvage. And we lights the city, not just for him, but for all of them that are still out there. 'Cause we knows there come a night, when they sees the distant light, and they'll be comin' home.

But then Mike P. saw the lights and thought it was an all you can eat buffet.

And I looked, and behold a crushed white horse,

and his name that sat on him was Death of comedy,

and hell followed with him."





























Cunts.

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Re: HA HA FUCKING HA! -- Heyo the Jester, 07:35:38 07/18/12 Wed

Anonymous Johnson is right!

Except for the part about Frank and the stripper.
She just said it was too badthat he was sitting down because his fat belly covered up his flaccid...I mean ragingly erect cock.

Then all the strippers yelled "You should get divorced!"
And a tear came to Frank's eye.
Sweet tears.
They were like candy to the man-mountain getting a lap dance next to him.









Cunts, indeed.


[ Edit | View ]

[> Re: HA HA FUCKING HA! -- Cliff, 14:33:04 07/18/12 Wed

Correction: Women won't fuck me, more than once.

There's a difference.

A bitter, humiliating difference.

But things are looking up, for everyone.

The Knot is making buckets of money, for it's investors.

Frank and Sean Kelly have formed a marriage counseling business.

Brian is still taller than me.

Mike P., well ya got me there.


[ Edit | View ]

[> Re: HA HA FUCKING HA! -- Artie, 22:30:04 07/18/12 Wed

You guys are pathetic.

I was just telling that to my wife,

the man of the house,

as she was fucking me

in my pussy.

My pussy was so sore after, I could barely do the laundry and make her dinner and do the dishes after.

But then she reminded me that if I didn't finish my housework she would cut off my allowance.

So I did as I was told, because there was this really nice piece of jewery I wanted. Oops I mean Jewelry. So after she gave me some of her money for me to spend to get myself something pretty I got a nice new pearl necklace from Brian.

I was confused.

Because I thought he liked men.



Well, Ta for now.

I'm off to finish my knitting and I have to go to bed early.

I missed my period this month and I have a 9AM doctors appointment.

(crosses fingers!)

Wish me luck boys!


[ Edit | View ]

[> Just wondering -- Frank, 11:22:09 07/19/12 Thu

How did you guys know to check this message board?
Do you check it regularly to make sure it's dead?

In my case, a little bird told me.

Also, in my case, the little bird owns a pub in NH and was never there for the gay stuff.


[ Edit | View ]

[> [> Re: Just wondering -- KoH, 14:11:26 07/19/12 Thu

>How did you guys know to check this message board?

They are obviously losers with no life. HELLOOO?? Have you met them? Or ever been to a Ren faire?

Brian is so desperate for stuff to do he puts on shows in front of cardboard castle cutouts slapped on a barn in front of telephone lines dressed up as Prince John in front of 5 people.

4 of which work there.

And one thought it was the 4H fair weekend.


[ Edit | View ]

[> [> [> Re: Just wondering -- Cliff, 16:32:03 07/19/12 Thu

Yep, we're losers.

Plus KoH sent us messages, on Facebook.

Along with pictures of Drag shows.

Seriously.


[ Edit | View ]

[> [> [> [> Re: Just wondering -- Brian, 18:14:21 07/25/12 Wed

Sorry I'mlate to the party.

:\"Time counts and keeps countin', and we knows now finding the trick of what's been and lost ain't no easy ride. But that's our trek, we gotta' travel it. And there ain't nobody knows where it's gonna' lead. Still in all, every night we does the tell, so that we 'member who we was and where we came from... but most of all we 'members the man that finded us, him that came the salvage. And we lights the city, not just for him, but for all of them that are still out there. 'Cause we knows there come a night, when they sees the distant light, and they'll be comin' home.

What the fuck was that? Poetry? Seriously? The third film? Really?

Any time I play Prince John for any reason it's gold in the bank.


[ Edit | View ]

[> [> [> Re: Just wondering -- Mike P (A pulse, or rigor mortis?), 08:54:11 07/27/12 Fri

>>How did you guys know to check this message board?
>
>They are obviously losers with no life. HELLOOO?? Have
>you met them? Or ever been to a Ren faire?
>
>Brian is so desperate for stuff to do he puts on shows
>in front of cardboard castle cutouts slapped on a barn
>in front of telephone lines dressed up as Prince John
>in front of 5 people.
>


>4 of which work there.
>
>And one thought it was the 4H fair weekend.


I'm glad to see you are off the monitoring bracelet, and back at what you do best...actually what you do best, is turn 18 year old college freshmen, into sock puppets and the lifetime ban from purchasing duct tape, hence the monitoring bracelet, "all you can eat buffet"Comic fucking gold sir! Oh how I've missed that razor sharp wit.


But I know your free time is limited, with all that digging, and removing of evidence behind the Knott.

I come to see if there are new naked chicks, and stumble across the Elephant graveyard of comedy.


[ Edit | View ]


[ Contact Forum Admin ]

Forum timezone: GMT-5
VF Version: 3.00b, ConfDB:
Before posting please read our privacy policy.
VoyForums(tm) is a Free Service from Voyager Info-Systems.
Copyright © 1998-2019 Voyager Info-Systems. All Rights Reserved.