Re: The art of joking and helpless tries to change a crazy world -- Talking Circle Alternative

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Date Posted: Sat, 11/29/03 7:26am
Author: Ylva
Subject: Re: The art of joking and helpless tries to change a crazy world
In reply to: OnB 's message, "Re: The art of joking" on Thu, 11/27/03 3:29pm

>Whew. I feel better.

That's good.

>One the things about me and my teasing is that I never
>really mean to offend anybody on a personal level. And
>if I inadvertantly do so, I always apologize.

I'm pretty much the same. It has happened more than once in my life that I offended and/or annoyed someone without intending to when horsing around. When I notice that, I feel miserable and apologize. The "dilemma" is that I'm quite sensitive and perceptive myself which means I can get annoyed if someone teases me...

...In a way that's contradictory and not really consequent, but I try to understand why it is so and see the positive side of it all. My conclusion is: if I weren't sensitive and perceptive myself, I would never be able to understand the feelings of an other person, feel empathy and apoligize when needed. Tell you what - doesn't that make us gentle-rascals?

>As for the sanctions etc., things have been such an
>emotional hotbed on the other board that I may be a
>little of a tendertoes and sensitive to words like
>that, and people feeling annoyed and such.
>

Yes, I understand. Though I don't have the time to read everything over there, I pay attention to some posters, i.e. those who come here on a more or less regular basis but also others who were asked to take part here, at least not actively...

...So I've gathered the atmosphere over there and must admit I've been negatively affected and sickened by what's been said there lately. What I've learned at the other board is how terribly rascist life can be. That simply makes me angry but most of all sad (I've gathered your take on this stuff and I must say I'm impressed by the way you say you handle these things)...

...I don't know if we over here on the otherside of the puddle live a more sheltered life than many people in the USA. We have our everyday problems too, it's just that they're of a bit different kind sometimes due to differences in society and history of our countries. But we don't have this kind of anger and hatred racism contains...

...Americans of all colors and shapes mostly connect Germany with WWII. No wonder. I live there since almost 14 years now and before I got here, I visited often during several years. If that country still had had any tendency of being rascist, I wouldn't live and love where I do. Things sure have changed to the very much better - thank goodness - and there is progress over here eventhough the average American may not be able or willing to gather that and how punished the contemporary generation(s), who have no influence on what was in the past, get(s) of and on for what their ancestors did. It's frustrating...

...So, when people get upset and angry and spew certain prejudice words about the the people my husband, relatives-in-law and all the others I love are of, I take offence. Lately, at the other board, one poster asked that alqazar guy* (see the footnote below) "what's the difference between you and Hitler?". That hurt like hell. Knowing how that feels, I think I understand when euroAmericans, or whoever else prepared to sink that low, call you names I've heard of but just won't repeat here because they're just as disgusting...

...The world is crazy. What I'm trying to say is I've been emotional, tendertoes and sensitive too lately and sometimes I feel so caught up between all the different points of view I feel I understand. I've had kind of a chaos in my mind about all these racist phenomenons that in a way are new to me because I've never experienced them that "close" before. This is a thing I have a hard time struggling with because I'm not used to it and don't really get the hang of how to handle it besides from simply being relative unbiased and non-racist myself...

...I feel a bit bad when trying to explain how I feel, because I'm so darn aware of those racist phenomenons are nothing you can just switch off the way you get off the computer with a few mouseclicks. I think I'm quite capable of understanding how hard it can be to live in a hostile environment (though I can't say I know what it's like because I never lived it)...

...All this stuff makes me very sad and bitter at times. I want the whole world to be good to everybody. Cheesy, ok, but anyway. That's being idealistic. You can't be idealistic and realistic at the same time. I guess that's what's the matter with me now: I don't really want to face reality and am struggling against desillusion and get frustrated...

...It's difficult to accept that things in life aren't as easy as you may wish. For instance: Stop racism and hate NOW! Changes take time and I'm impatient. Maybe people can cause changes to the positive little by little; what would we do if there weren't any hope? That is a reason to be for instance here and communicate...

...Sometimes you cover up grief and hopelessness with humour. At least that's what I do from time to time, put on a mask and play the clown and don't always know where the limits are and due to our quite different perspectives, the whole joking around may seem terribly whacky. And the thing about not always knowing when it's the perfect time for joke and the proper "dose" of it, a whole lot of insecurity come into play.

>So you don't want your retinas scanned anytime soon,
>eh?

Rites for the clearsighted. Need an appointment for that?

>Sauna Ladle?!?

Yeah. You see, I'm a mix of nations too (besides living in a foreign coutry), just like you. It's just that I'm no 50/50 blend, but 75% Swede and 25% Finn; hence this consciously multicultural choice of "weapon".

>(scampering away will now re-commence)
>
>OnB(scamperscamperscamperscamperscamperscamperscamper..
>...)

You crack me up! �� - "scamperscamper" - heeey, where are my clogs...??!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Footnote:
* (who had good intentions but blew it all because he was disrespectful, swearing and not able to understand the specific situation many of you indigenous peoples are in - especially when it comes to questions about the army - even though some people being patient took time to explain what he obviously wasn't able to get)

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Replies:

Re: The art of joking and helpless tries to change a crazy world -- OnB, Sun, 11/30/03 2:19am