很好很好 --

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Date Posted: 22:54:32 10/21/02 Mon
Author: 社長
Subject: 很好很好
In reply to: 千古(細)小人 's message, "憶江南一套(四首) + 謝師恩" on 12:50:17 10/20/02 Sun

憶江南四首，頭三首分別以選手、啦啦隊、觀眾為視點，第四首為揉合三者的總結，「槍聲過」、「風雲起雨下淋漓」之意象為四首的共同母題，大有多重視點之感。
不過，某些詞語入於古詩之中略見兀突，如可再作推敲則更佳。

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Replies:

可否明言那些為之"突兀"之語?好作潤飾一番。 -- 千古(細)小人, 13:29:54 10/22/02 Tue
- 上下席間空間隔雖免突兀，又失了原意 (NT) -- 社長, 13:42:20 10/23/02 Wed
  - 那用「上下欄杆空間隔」，合了原意,古詞中亦有欄杆一詞,可會好些? (NT) -- 千古(細)小人, 13:38:47 10/24/02 Thu
    - 「空間」也是一個問題 (NT) -- 社長, 15:57:28 10/24/02 Thu
      - Re: 「空間」也是一個問題 -- 多口人, 20:04:28 10/25/02 Fri
        因平仄之故,斷句方式當如君所說,但看起來所生的歧異要求高的話是可免則免的,梓聰是詩社的學生,故有此要求 (NT) -- 社長, 20:54:17 10/25/02 Fri

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