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Date Posted: 18:09:36 05/18/08 Sun
Author: Sluva
Subject: That's what I wanna know.... HOW exactly does one punishes someone for having sex... unprotected or otherwise? It's not like if they used a condom THIS would have never happend...
In reply to: OTWB 's message, "How should Starr be "punished" for having unprotected sex with Coal?" on 17:02:53 05/18/08 Sun

Should Blair be screaming at her? Humiliating her? Jabbing her? Mocking her? Lecturing her? What exactly can anyone say to that girl that she hasn't figured out all ready? I don't understand this "taking responsibility" I keep reading.. what is she suppose to do flagellate herself until she's learned her lesson....Starr is now living with the obvious consequences her mistake she knows....unprotected sex is playing Russian Roulette with your life, your life style, possibly your whole future! I don't see her looking to blame anyone else for what she and her little boyfriend did.

What exactly is this free pass that she is getting? Should her Mama shake her? Kick her out? Stop speaking to her? Scorn her? Shame her until she can turn back time and undo what she did? Make her wear a sign that says..

"I had sex with a dope and he didn't wear a condom?"
"My father is a ball grabbing freak and it's my fault"
"I destroyed my family because I had sex with my boyfriend"
"I made my father crazy and now he beats on kids because I had sex with my boyfriend"
"I'm sixteen, I had sex with my boyfriend...I'm a sinner!!!!"
"Sorry.. I destroyed my family because I let Cole Thornheart touch my secret place"
"My father is a rapist.. my mother is a crazy.. I'm sixteen and pregnant.. I'm so sorry!"

Kids are going to F up that is what they do. The parents are suppose to know that and they are suppose to keep it together and sort thing out and make it bearable for eveyone...not make thing insufferably worse by being certifiably stupid over and over and over again.

Unless of course I am misunderstanding what free pass and taking responsibility means in this instance. Because if Starr is supposed to somehow blame herself for her family imploding YET AGAIN.. I can't and will not get down that. If Starr isn't suppose to blame anyone for her poor choices then I sure as hell don't want to hear grown folks who fancy themselves when it suits them.. "Benevolent Head of Family" but who are really Obtuse Malevolent Dictators as soon as they don't get their way.... try to pass the buck. I know Blair has been a doormat and Todd's kind of stupid is to the bone but no one is forcing them to stay that way.

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Replies:

[> [> I agree, it is not Starr's fault that Todd went bat shit crazy, Todd has no one to blame for the demise of his happy family life, but himself. He is an adult who acted like a kid. There is no excuse for his behavior. Starr is a kid, and like a kid, she really does not understand the reality of being a mom. However, she will have Blair and the rest of the Cramer women to support her which will be very important. -- lucy, 19:18:02 05/18/08 Sun


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[> [> [> I'm thinking if she carries this baby to term, she's gonna get it in spades. I'm thinking its already started to dawn on her. She's a bright girl, she may not like it but she pretty much knows what happens next, Her reality check had her puking and begging for her mother yesterday. -- OTWB, 19:25:51 05/18/08 Sun

Soon, she'll get fat, he ankles will swell. She'll probably have vivid nightmares, strange food cravings, gas, indigestion... Oh yeah and all those pretty clothes? Oh well, they won't fit, but Auntie Dorian will go to Omar the tentmaker and have something done that'll fit like a glove.

If you're going to carry a baby, you better want it, cuz the only thing that gets you thru it, is the thought that you're going to have a beautiful baby, beloved by you and your... 18 year old husband with no discernable job skills who plays a mean game of football.

Pregnancy is its own reality check, IMHO.


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[> [> ITA..Sometimes the best way for kids to learn is to live and understand it for themselve. When I was a kid they called it "The Hard Way". Nothing Blair will can or will say will MAKE Starr see more then the reality she is already living. She is sixteen and she's pregnant she knows it she knows how she got that way... that is her reality. Maybe now when grown up talk she will be more apt to listen. -- sluva, 03:23:44 05/19/08 Mon


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[> [> But but...if they'd used a condom, this probably WOULD never have happened. None of this. -- Cathy, 04:44:33 05/19/08 Mon


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[> [> [> Key word being.... Probably... -- sluva, 05:24:54 05/19/08 Mon

it happens to lots of people who use condoms... birth control and other forms of contraceptives... She had sex and she got pregnant...them the breaks.


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[> [> [> [> Re: I wish it had played that way -- that they used a condom and it broke. That would have made more since since not until this incident has Starr been portrayed as so incredibly clueless and frankly, stupid. -- Cathy, 06:15:42 05/19/08 Mon


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[> [> [> [> [> duh - that should say - that would have made more SENSE (not since) -- Cathy, 08:07:16 05/19/08 Mon


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[> [> [> I got pregnant with my daughter while on the pill... Nope, I didn't miss one either. My md decided I didn't need to know that tetracycline counteracted my BC pills. Two babies, two years. Ya think I did that on purpose? They're great kids, I don't regret it... but rough business and I didn't go asking for it. -- OTWB, 13:07:54 05/19/08 Mon

Condoms aren't 100% either. I wish they would have at least made an attempt at birth control, but all they can do it buck up and move forward at this point.


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