| Subject: Mud Bath |
Author:
Chris
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Date Posted: 06:14:32 04/21/01 Sat
In reply to:
(required)
's message, "Re: Innumerable Bulls Eyes" on 01:00:17 04/21/01 Sat
Haaaaaa!!!! Yeah, no doubt, what you say is real as rain and difficult and true, no doubt. Well good ol' Joan will discover in time (or not) that once we sliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide on down to the basin of the pit of our rank truth, there's no such thing as primly clapping our hands after a hard day's work, never to return to our putrid shadows, no sirree madame.
Perhaps we can find, as in this forum, places where we can welcome all that with ever wider room. The bullwhip image is useful once, maybe twice - then it's time to turn it back in and know nothing again. Sure - occasionally we achieve Indiana Jones glory, slicing a loud CRACK in mid-air as a new recognition snaps into place - but who's keeping score? This is planet earth, and our poor bodies have acclimatized to its ravaged landscape to get here, so I for one am not placing my bet on being quick and clean with this work.
YOU are the instructor, at least in this moment, for me. YOU are the one giving me permission to sag back into my lump of body and breathe just as I am, right here, not trying to reconstruct that loaded hypermasculine expectation to get it all done in one night and then smile like a studded superstar happily ever after.
The whole point is to be engaged (once married, that is) with matter and all things of the dark earth. To really fall heart-first straight into the mud. Each day I fall again. Each day I don't know where I am. Each day makes yesterday a kind of dream, a faded memory.
Splat!!!
Huh?!
Mmmmmmmm.....
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