| Subject: Smile |
Author:
Kamani
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Date Posted: 10:02:47 01/02/03 Thu
In reply to:
???
's message, "Uh ohhhhhhhhh" on 13:00:33 12/31/02 Tue
His dulled eyes glow with a peaceful happiness for his friend, his friend whose mate had waited all these years. His mate, the Light Princess, the mare who had gone to live in the dark (in literal and figurative terms) Pass with him, and despite returning to her parents' home had waited for him in mind and soul ever since.
Lucky sod, comes the thought of the more aggravating side of Kamani, the side that will never let up. Shut up, replies the ordinary one that everyone sees, speaks to, knows and 'loves'. But the incessant one doesn't listen. You going to tell him you're not Evil Lead any more? That you tried to kill Ziraga, that you had your position stripped? That all you are now is a self-pitying, useless moron without even a home to call his own?
I doubt it. Kamani's ears snap back as the cruel voice inside berates and chastises and insults him, as it always has done since his sense of self-worth took a sabbatical and never returned since. He too hopes, like Dancey, that maybe somehow things will be the way they were; him and Darey, free and fun-loving. Kamani with his jokes and his cocky over-confidence, his endless flirtation but inability to commit. Not likely, contemplates the ever-so-slightly embittered true Kamani... the one from whom the hater stemmed. For the second voice is born of guilt, guilt for his self-pity, guilt for his uselessness, guilt, indeed, for his guilt.
"He thinks he's not cut out for much?" he mutters. "Well, Darey, join the club."
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