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Date Posted: Fri, Nov 14 2003, 18:30:24
Author: Asp, bored of the troll that wouldn't starve.
Subject: "This story contains graphic sex, bestiality (between a human female and a werewolf), stocking and garterbelt fetish, and some sappy romantic intrigue near the end."

<a rel=nofollow target=_blank href="http://greyarchive.greyarchive.org/Red1.htm">Why She's Called Little Red Riding Hood</a>
Courtesy of The Greyarchive.

Well...it's not Godawful in a "chugging cyanide while committing the hara-kiri" way, but still, it's pretty damn bad. It looks like it was written within twenty minutes by a fanboy typing with one hand. And the author's notes! Dear God, the author's notes! I've never seen so many in my life!

Anyway. Some of the highlights were:

<i>"Why, what a BIG DICK YOU HAVE THERE," said Red. Before the Wolf could react, Red had climbed over on top of the Wolf and planted a kiss on his mouth, at the same time grabbing onto the big bulge. She started licking up and down the sides of his snout, elliciting a moan of approval from the Wolf.

"Do you really think you could've pass for my grandmother?" she cutely said. "Besides, I knew you were going to be here anyways. I saw you looking down at me from the tree limb."

"But… wait a minute… how did you know…," panted the wolf. It was hard for the wolf to talk as Red continued to stroke up and down the erection that was about to bust through his pants.

"Well, for one thing, I have good eyes," said Red as she pulled back the covers and proceeded to slide his pants off. The site of Wolf's erection brought a smile to her face. It was thick and had a ten inch length.</i>

*snorts* Oh, subtle. Real subtle.

<i>"I'M CUMMING!!!" screamed Red. She came hard on Wolf's fingers, Wolf feeling the sudden increasing tightness around his digits. She creamed all over Wolf's face as Wolf struggled to drink in all her cum. Wolf suddenly realized that his appetite was partly sated by drinking her cum in. Wolf gently grabbed her hips and laid her down on the bed. Red laid there, panting from an unusually intense orgasm from someone eating her out.

"That…was…fantastic…and…you…didn't…even…lick…my…clit," she panted. She was all of a sudden surprised by his tongue licking at her pussy again.

"Ooohhh…ooooo…uhhhh…"was she could pant.

"I never knew you could cum so easily," he said while he was busy sticking his tongue in and out of her cunt lips, "and taste so good". He said that last statement with a grin. He then took his fingers and pulled back the hood that was hiding her clit. He was amazed by how red and erect it was. He then proceeded to softly pinch her clit between his fingers. She moaned loudly, and Wolf liked this response. Using his tongue, he began to flick at it.

"OOOOHHH, MY GOOOOOOOD," she yelled out loud. Wolf continued licking at her clit like the wavering flicker of a candle.

"PLEASE, MAKE ME CUM!!!"</i>

*insane giggling* The all caps dialogue. It never ceases to amuse me.

And now...the "sappy romantic intrigue":

<i>"I hope your grandmother isn't angry at me," said Wolf.

"No, she's not," replied Red. "As a matter of fact, she asked me how it was." Wolf smiled, knowing that grandma didn't hate him (hey, I'm a sucker for things working out).

"There's something I've been wanting to tell you since I woke up this morning," Red said kind of seriously. "It's…well…I've been thinking that last night was the greatest sex I've ever had." Wolf's pointed ears went up at this. "And I don't know what it is I'm feeling, but I think I love you." This statement completely shocked Wolf. "It's just that, every lover I've ever had never took quite the care and attention you did during our love-making." This was weird for Wolf because this was true. He never took this much care and attention whenever he was having sex with anyone (or anything) else.

What am I going to do? I'd both be lying and telling the truth if I said I loved her too. I can't say I love you just because the sex was great. But then again, she went through all the trouble to fix me breakfast. Nobody's fixed me breakfast since my mother did when I was a cub. (Sniff…Sniff…hey hey hey… I'm not crying, there's a big speck of dust in my eye, get back to the story). Not knowing what else to say, he could only say the first words that came to his mind.

"I love you too," said Wolf.</i>

Such character development. Such impeccable pacing. Such drama. This author is just <i>destined</i> for fame!

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