Toilet Humour 'Myths?' -- 49 (Inkerman) Battery Message Board

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Subject: Toilet Humour 'Myths?'

Author:
Jim Martin

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Date Posted: 13:30:02 02/27/05 Sun

This piece is dedicated to the 'Phantom Shit'ter'. Whoever he may have been! I think every unit in the Army must have had one of these Characters at sometime or another! "They seek him here,they seek him there!"Like Zorro,always left his mark! So did 'The Phantom Shit'ter'. I suppose it was done to either get back at a certain individual or the system that would make up work,even if there was nothing to be done! Mindless fatiques for example!...Bullshit parades that usually entailed cleaning and polishing everything in sight above and beyond the call of duty so to speak! In other words "If you are going to give us this Shit,then you can have this in return!..A gesture of defiance you could say! I can't say off hand, whether any of these guys ever got caught in the act of doing the business of producing a walnut whip and signing off with a flourish!The fact being that nobody was above suspicion. We all had some idea of who it was,but could never prove it!...The senior ranks used to go ballistic at these desecrations and threaten any amount of punnishment for the offender! But alas,to no avail! Some bright spark even started to run a 'book'on who the likely candidate was?...in the Battery Club! Regardless the 'Powers that Be'sooner or later usually realised the error of their ways and stopped the mindless fatiques and bullshit parades etc....at least for the time being!....And the 'Phantom' went back into the Toilet closet,until the next time! As the senior Rank said "Don't Shit on my Parade!".....Who is he trying to Fool?.......What say you?

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