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Date Posted: 21:35:13 10/31/01 Wed
Author: shade
Author Host/IP: 207.193.34.199
Subject: chop and compare

You can't compare apples and oranges
Unless you say they're both round
And they can prevent syringes

You can't compare peaches and nectarines
Unless you say they're both sweet but not to a Marine

Marines only eat meat and drink whiskey straight
Even though they don't feel it, they manifest hate
Since I've never been close to a Marine for a fortnight
My comments are prejudiced and may not be right

If there's anyone out there who knows a Marine
Tell me, are they sweet or are they mean?

You can't compare a penis to vagina
You can only intermingle them
But not in North or South Carolina
(It's against the Law!)

You can't compare UPN to CBS
Unless you say you watch them both
On the same TV set

You can't compare my poetry to art
Unless you enjoy getting burnt by a strawberry pop-tart

You can't compare my socks to my shoes
But I can tell you I earned my footwear through years of paying dues

You can't compare apples to oranges:
Whoever said that hadn't met the Lawrences!

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