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Date Posted: 17:37:33 08/15/10 Sun
Author: debikm
Subject: A wedding
In reply to: debikm 's message, "Eat At Joe's" on 09:12:05 08/07/10 Sat

It's taken all day to get this down, but Valerie and Daniel now have a wedding scene! Of course, when I started writing, I couldn't just start with the wedding itself. I had to start with she and her sister arguing about the dress, then I had to write a bit with her getting ready and Sheila fussing with her hair, and that led to Daniel's mother loaning her a necklace to wear that had been a gift from Daniel's father...whew! I finally got to the wedding scene and it still needs some tweaking and fleshing out, it's there and out of my brain. I can't take credit for their personal vows to each other; I swiped those from a website of wedding vows for second marriages. So there!
***********
excerpt from New Tricks, copyright 2010 by Debi Matlack, all rights reserved. Posted for sharing and critique purposes only; does not constitute publication.
****
White chairs, filled with people wearing warm summer colors were arranged in a semicircle under the great oaks, early afternoon sun slanting in shafts through the boughs. The arbor Tom and Daniel built stood between two of the massive trunks, its arch draped with simple green fabric and woven with white lights. Vic sat to one side, playing something soft on the guitar. Nessa stood with Kelly, who almost vibrated with excitement. When Tom and Valerie exited the house, she nodded at Vic. He concluded the piece he played then paused, causing a hush to come over the gathering. His fingers moved over the strings and Bach rippled from the guitar. Nessa sent Kelly down the aisle with a warning not to run. Valerie followed her progress, then saw Nessa take Alan’s arm and they walked between the rows of chairs. Tom patted Valerie's hand.

“Ready Possum?”

“Oh yeah.”

The faces of her family and friends beamed at her as she and Tom approached. As they came around the oak that marked the edge of the wedding zone, she looked up and saw Daniel, waiting for her.

Wow.

His dark grey morning suit and black jacket set off his looks to perfection, the wing collar and silver tie making him look like he fell off the cover of one of those trashy romance novels. Unbutton the shirt to his waist, tousle his hair and the image would be complete. That would come later, but not nearly soon enough for Valerie. His eyes met hers and his lips pursed in a silent wolf-whistle.

She shook with silent laughter, making Tom glance over at her in concern. He paused with her under the arbor, reaching out to shake Daniel’s hand and then turned back to Valerie. His eyes were brimming and she shook her head. “Don’t start.”

“I’m trying.” She hugged him hard and when she released her father, he took her hand and placed it in Daniel’s before fleeing to his seat next to Catherine. Nessa took her bouquet from her and handed it to Kelly. Daniel took her other hand in his as they faced one another, his eyes widening when he saw the aquamarine sparkling at her throat. The guitar faded to quiet.

Cyrus grinned at the two of them, bright teeth contrasting with his dark skin. Valerie had been surprised to discover he was a notary and he’d been delighted when she asked him to officiate. His reassuring presence filled the space beneath the arbor with a quiet peace.

“Valerie and Daniel have invited us to share the joy of their marriage today. Life has given them a second chance at love.” He looked at them both, his face so serious Valerie felt a giggle bubbling at the back of her throat. Her nervous tittering was forgotten in the gravity of his words.

“Do you together promise in the presence of your friends and family that you will at all times and in all circumstances, conduct yourselves toward one another as becomes Husband and Wife?”

In chorus, she and Daniel replied, “We do.”

He gave Valerie a nod and she opened her mouth, only to find no voice for a moment. Clearing her throat, she tried again. “Daniel, today I join my life to yours as your friend, your lover, and your confidant. Let me be the shoulder you lean on, the rock on which you rest, the companion of your life. With you I will walk my path from this day forward.” Her voice quavered and she felt him squeeze her fingers. With that same strong grip, he tugged her a touch closer and spoke.

“Valerie, I marry you with my eyes wide open. You have helped me let go of the past, and I embrace the future. Thank you for making me laugh again. Bless you for taking my hand as we begin anew.”

She was taken by the look in his eyes. They glowed with unabashed joy. Any niggling fears were banished by the force of that magnetic gaze. There was a touch of sadness beneath it and she knew that he would always love Cassandra, but he loved her as well. They had overcome serious hurdles, the both of them, to be able to stand up this day and take vows before their friends and family.

Cyrus extracted the customary promises to love, honor and protect from them. They exchanged rings and Cyrus paused.

“ ‘One word frees us from all the weight and pain of life. That word is Love.’” Putting a hand on their shoulders, he turned them to face the gathering. “Please join me in blessing this couple with your love and joy. Mr. Hollingsworth, you may kiss your missus.”

Daniel gave her a ferocious grin, swept her into his arms and kissed her thoroughly, cheers and hoots erupting from their collected families. She was out of breath when he stood her back up. She took a moment to collect herself, the catcalls fading.

“What are we waiting for?” she called. “Let’s party!”

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Replies:

[> [> Touching and real >>> -- Fi, 09:15:08 08/16/10 Mon

Wedding scenes run the risk of being stereotypical or saccharine, but Valerie's and Daniel's big day out is anything but. You've brought out the individuality of their characters and the genuine feeling behind their vows.

>Nessa sent Kelly down the
>aisle with a warning not to run.
There's so much in this one sentence. Kelly's excitement, Nessa's protectiveness.

>Valerie had been
>surprised to discover he was a notary and he’d been
>delighted when she asked him to officiate.
Cyrus is an old friend, I presume? He sounds like someone who has been introduced earlier. I love his "you may kiss your missus" line.

>“Thank you for making me laugh again.”
Doesn't that line say it all?

>“What are we waiting for?” she called. “Let’s party!”
I bet they're going to boogie the night away!

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[> [> [> Thanks, Fi! -- Debi, 13:07:59 08/16/10 Mon

>Wedding scenes run the risk of being stereotypical or
>saccharine, but Valerie's and Daniel's big day out is
>anything but. You've brought out the individuality of
>their characters and the genuine feeling behind their
>vows.

Thank you. I decided to time-lapse it when I was on the verge of writing everything word for word. It didn't need to be.
>
>>Nessa sent Kelly down the
>>aisle with a warning not to run.
>There's so much in this one sentence. Kelly's
>excitement, Nessa's protectiveness.

Kelly is WAY excited, and I'll incorporate more of that as I fill in the previous events.
>
>>Valerie had been
>>surprised to discover he was a notary and he’d been
>>delighted when she asked him to officiate.
>Cyrus is an old friend, I presume? He sounds like
>someone who has been introduced earlier. I love his
>"you may kiss your missus" line.

In the previous story Old Dogs, Cyrus is a friend of the family and a drummer. Every Thanksgiving they have a big get-together and play music. Cyrus brings his 5 gallon bucket to play;-)
>
>>“Thank you for making me laugh again.”
>Doesn't that line say it all?

It does. Having lost his first wife to cancer, he took a long time to grieve.
>
>>“What are we waiting for?” she called. “Let’s party!”
>I bet they're going to boogie the night away!

Stay up and play music all night!

Thanks again for your kind comments. As long as these people stay real, I know I'm doing my job adequately.
Hugs,
Debi

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[> [> Very nice Debi! Very sweet and in character and >>> -- Myxtress, 11:19:59 08/18/10 Wed

I loved the touch of having Vic playing the guitar as it made the choas of wedding well-wishers seem more intimate somehow. *G*

Anyway, when I'm MIA, I usually try to keep up with the posts, even if I don't respond, but even so, I don't recollect Cyrus. But my first impression of him was that he's a fun-lovin' kind of guy and that is reinforced when he's so serious that it makes Valerie lose her nervous tendency to giggle.

A blessing well done. Thanks for sharing!

Hugs

Esther

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[> [> [> Thank you Esther! and an intro to Cyrus inside. -- Debi, 12:47:59 08/18/10 Wed

I don't recollect Cyrus. But my first impression of him
>was that he's a fun-lovin' kind of guy and that is
>reinforced when he's so serious that it makes Valerie
>lose her nervous tendency to giggle.

He's an old friend and always hangs out with them on their Thanksgiving gathering and music jam. Here's my intro from near the end of Old Dogs.

excerpt from Old Dogs., copyright Debi Matlack 2009-2010, all rights reserved. Posted for sharing purposes only; does not constitute publication.
***
An impromptu amphitheatre had sprouted on the sandy clearing at the shoreline, and people began to drift that way. Most of them carried instruments and lawn chairs which began to ring the bed of wood, people settling in to listen and participate. A few stragglers were coming down the driveway, Valerie greeting most of them with a hug. A big black man stopped when he saw her and grinned, putting down the plastic five-gallon bucket he carried.

“Val, I’m glad to see you home.”

“Cyrus!” She had to stand on tiptoe to reach him but he scooped her into a bear hug, lifting her feet off the ground. “I’d have thought you’d have enough sense to stay away from my brother after all these years.”

Cyrus chuckled, a deep soft sound. “Nah, he’s the only white boy I know can play the blues like it’s supposed to sound, outside of Eric Clapton, and him I don’t know personally.”

“How’s Cheryl and the boys?”

Cyrus nodded back toward the driveway. “You can ask them yourself, they’ll be here in a couple of minutes.”

“Still playing the bucket?”

“You know it. It sounds like a whole drum kit now, except for the cymbals, and it’s a helluva lot more portable.”

She gestured toward the crowd gathering. “Go make yourself at home. Let me finish up a couple of chores and we’ll get started.”

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