Date Posted:12:44:58 03/23/10 Tue Author:susiej Subject: Larn>>> In reply to:
Larn
's message, "Hi, everybody! Whoo!" on 01:18:18 03/23/10 Tue
I remember another post from this but not the cliffhanger post- woo ee! I'd have been spitting mad at you!
And I liked the other post- it was the beginning, I think.
Anyway, its nice to see the whole piece. Good work.
My only comment seconds Alex, somewhat- but it wasn't the dialogue that got wordy to me ('cept that one long paragraph about points). It was all the talk of rein lenghts and horse muscles and such. I had a horse. I love horse talk, but it was a little much for me. Maybe because I could imagine what was going on without it? I just know I wanted the action/results faster. But I am greedy that way.
>It was all the talk of rein
>lenghts and horse muscles and such. I had a horse. I
>love horse talk, but it was a little much for me.
>Maybe because I could imagine what was going on
>without it?
I suppose it should have dawned on me when I kept having to think of synonyms for everything that I was getting a little too loquacious. Spot on, the both of you. Time to edit!
>I just know I wanted the action/results
>faster. But I am greedy that way.
No, I get you. And I think that's what I've been worrying over the scene for. It just needs to get out and get over with.
susiej