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Saturday, May 16, 12:20:08pm [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, [2], 3, 4, 5, 6 ]

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Date Posted: 21:23:00 01/20/04 Tue
Author: Jenifer
Subject: My grief bear.

I mentioned my grief bear (not a very original name, but that's all it has for the moment)in a post and I thought I'd share her story.

I had a friend who lost her husband a few years ago. I had just gone through a m/c and also had finally started wading through the suppressed grief of all my previous m/c's up to that point. I remember sitting in the floor, my heart hurting so bad with what I call a hole of emptyness in it. All I could do was clutch a pillow to my chest and rock back and forth in hopes of easing the pain.

When I heard of my friend's loss, I remember thinking how hard it would be to sleep in an empty bed. So, I bought her a bear. And I mean a HUGE Bear. One of those with the soft, smooth texture, not furry. She later told me how much it meant to her.

Not even a year later our Bishop's oldest daughter died suddenly in a freak accident. As soon as I could, I went out and bought his wife one of these. My husband watched me cuddle one on the way to deliver it and said, you need one of these don't you. So for my birthday he bought me one.

I had gotten to the point that she mostly sat on my dresser, but since I lost Anna, she's been put to great use.
I guess I should name her, but since she's comforted me through the loss of two twin girls and another baby girl, I'm not sure what would work. Maybe Peace Bear would be more appropriate.

Anyway, that's the story behind my grief bear.

Jenifer,
Mother to six earth angels and seven angels in Heaven
Our newest angels left us Dec. 5, 2003
We miss you Anna Marie

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Replies:

[> I think you'll find a name....m -- Jo, 14:49:53 01/21/04 Wed

By yourself in time, but for now, Grief Bear is just great! We used ours for therapy for the kids - they took it to bed, spoke to it, cried with it...it was wonderful and we all have fond memories of the Hannah bear fulfilling a very unique need.

I feel blessed to know someone who can readily see that special need for other people...even though I am saddened that we've had to meet this way, I still feel very blessed.

Jo


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[> We too have a bear ! -- Heather S., 19:10:22 01/21/04 Wed

We took the kids to "Build A Bear" and let them pick one out. The stuffed him with tons of love and kisses.
Eachone put a heart inside before he was sewn up.
We call him Noah's bear. We dressed him in a cute little outfit. We don't let the kids play with him but they do cuddle him and tell the bear stories etc.

It really helps me out. The kids really loved making this for their little brother.


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[> [> Our kids....m -- Jo, 06:14:26 01/22/04 Thu

Do use our bigger version - we actually ended up purchasing a total of 3 bears (2 small ones and one larger one). One small one was buried with Hannah, one sits inside of her cabinet in our bedroom and the other larger one gets slept with and such.

I loved the idea of building your own bear - I've only seen one of those places once, but I still know where it is! The hearts are just enough to make me tears up this morning!

Jo


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