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Saturday, May 16, 09:15:28am [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, [3], 4, 5, 6 ]

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Date Posted: 11:42:12 12/15/03 Mon
Author: Jo
Subject: I am so glad that you found us, but sorry that it is under....m
In reply to: Lauren 's message, "Evelyn Ashley" on 10:39:51 12/15/03 Mon

These circumstances - my many many heartfelt sympathies on the death of your sweet little Evelyn. What a beautiful name for what was obviously a very much beloved and wanted little girl.

I, too, lost a daughter - Hannah Patrice - at 27.3 wks gestation 4 yrs ago. Evelyn and Hannah share the same birth month, but our Hannah was born on the 3rd.

I can totally commiserate with what sacrament meetings were like - or friends being pg at the same time - it isn't an easy place to be at. Be patient with yourself and only do what you are capable of doing, when you want to do it. It is OK to say no things and to people, esp around the holidays or anniversaries, so please keep that in mind.

And it is also OK to wonder...I did that for a long time, knowing that HF knew more than me what the future would hold for me and my family, but it still hurt. Knowing what we know doesn't and shouldn't stop our grieving - it is a natural human reaction to loss of any kind, but esp a child - but above all, we have hope and the knowledge of knowing where our children are. Eventually, peace will replace the pain -

Please keep posting - I'll keep you in my prayers -

Jo

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Replies:

[> Lauren, I'm glad you found us -- lynece, 19:43:19 12/15/03 Mon

I too had my losses before I had any living children and I know the empty feeling. Your grief is so fresh and though I can't promise you it will ever go away, the pain will fade in time. Our churh is so hard to be childless in and worse when no one but you and your DH seem to even think your baby was real because she never took a breath. I remember hiding out in the bathroom during one sacrament meeting, and often I couldn't make myself go at all. Heavenly Father understands your anger and will be there for you. I had a hard time praying or reading my scriptures, but loved to read the hymns, both primary and regular. Where can I turn for peace always lifts my spirits and lets me know I'm not alone.

Please feel free to post about anything here. We understand your pain in a way that most never will. My best advice to you is to hold close to your DH. Men grieve very differently and you will need to stay close to communicate. My DH was my lifesaver.

God Bless you. I'm so sorry you had to be here, but glad of the chance to get to know you.

Love, Lynece


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