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Date Posted: 11:52:52 04/15/03 Tue
Author: Melissa
Subject: I understand what you are saying, and we do that as well. . .(m)
In reply to: chattyf 's message, "Here's a different way to think of it. (m)" on 11:09:09 04/15/03 Tue

We have tried for a long time to "talk" about what he is feeling to help him put it into words instead of tears. I tell him we can talk about it rather than cry. I explain that I can't understand him when he's crying, but I want to know what's wrong, etc. However, what we are running into is that he seems to cry for everything. They kids want to play ball this way and not his way. Or yesterday he and another were playing guns and he wanted to switch but the other kid didn't, she wanted to keep her own, so he cried. I'm not sure how to handle this. He is very emotional, and sensitive. He'll cry while watching movies sometimes, when animals get hurt or lose their owners, but I'm the same way and I hug him, let him cry, and let him know it's ok and that things will work out in the movie. However, some of these other situations I'm not sure how to deal with. We've tried getting him to learn how to express it in words. He does sometimes, and if he uses a word that may not sound fitting (mad instead of sad) I try to help him rephrase it and understand the difference. However, crying 'cause a kid wants to play with their own toy I just don't get. Does that make sense? The teasing and crying are separate incidents, and I didn't mean to make them sound one in the same. I understand the teasing can hurt his feelings, and I'm sure it would make me want to cry too. It's the other little things he cries about that puts me at my nerves end. I mean, crying in the car because he wants something to drink and we don't have anything, but are 2 mins. from home, yet he still cries about it. Sometimes I just get beside myself.

Thanks for sharing another view on things. I like to believe that in many aspects we do try to approach things in a manner that is not condenscending and more affirming and building of his confidence. However, there are times that I'm left with uncertainty as to why he's crying and how to deal with it.

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