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Date Posted: 18:06:54 04/08/03 Tue
Author: fiwee
Subject: WHY does everything have to be so hard??? Major hugs needed (m)

I just got back from trying to take Elias to the pediatrician for his one-year checkup. I signed up for the military HMO, Tricare Prime, back when DH first got activated. I faxed in the enrollment form and assumed it was all ok. Well, they wouldn't see me today because I was supposedly ineligible for care. I just got off the phone with them and they never received the fax. I can't find the original documents to back up the fact that I sent them. I am so frustrated!!! This means that even if I enroll today, we don't have the HMO-type insurance now until MAY 1st! I could scream!!!! I don't have the money to pay the deductible right now for the other version of Tricare.

I almost started crying at the dr.'s office when I had to leave without being seen, after sitting there waiting for 45 minutes, with Elias running around, picking up who knows how many new germs. He woke up today with a cold and a cough, and I have a sore throat. So I called in sick at work because my sitter has a little girl and I knew she didn't need to be exposed to a new cold. I'm behind on work because I CAN'T get any work done here at home because all of my time is spent cleaning up, taking care of the kids and everything else that DH might normally do. Zachary has been super whiny all day. The new minivan's engine is sounding rattly. We might be able to go down and see DH this weekend, but my mother in law is coming, too, and the LAST thing I want is to share even a minute of this precious family time with her!!!!!!!!! My friend Pam reminded me that I have two sons and that one day I might be in her position and would want an understanding daughter-in-law who would let me tag along to see him. I know she's right, but I'm feeling very selfish right now. She annoys the hell out of me and reminds me of a chihuahua, full of nervous energy and yipping all the time (and smoking...ugh).

I just want to call some of the ladies who offered help to me and tell them to come take my kids so I can crawl in bed and sleep for a couple of days! But, I can't really do that, too many deadlines at work, too much going on.

Thanks if you made it reading, this far. I needed a safe place to vent...sometimes I swear I feel like I'm going to explode!

Kari

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