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Date Posted: 13:15:16 10/28/05 Fri
Author: Sophist
Subject: To me, the first question is....
In reply to: Sunshine 's message, "Re: The term you are looking for is "whore chasing"" on 12:33:35 10/28/05 Fri

why did Xander give his speech to Buffy instead of Riley? After all, in a relationship both parties have it within their ability to resolve the issues. By going to Buffy, Xander puts this responsibility solely on her. In that circumstance, it's hard to avoid the implication that the breakup was her fault.

Then, when you read his words, it's pretty clear that he thinks it IS her fault (see below).

I believe Xander said “If Riley is the guy…”. I did not interpret his position as “Riley is the guy and you are at fault here”.

No, he did say Riley was "the one". Here's what he said:

"Xander: Yeah. I think you mean convenient. I think you took it for granted that he was gonna show up when you wanted him to, and take off when you didn't.
***
Xander: But you miss the point. You shut down, Buffy. And you've been treating Riley like the rebound guy. When he's the one that comes along once in a lifetime. (Buffy looks dismayed) He's never held back with you. He's risked everything. And you're about to let him fly because you don't like ultimatums?"

Just to add, in response to manwitch, a comment on Xander's speech to Anya: In light of subsequent events I think Anya later had good reason to doubt Xander's sincerity. That makes it questionable whether Xander really "got" it.

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