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Date Posted: 07:43:05 02/13/04 Fri
Author: Dan G.
Subject: To all of the keyboard junkies

Over the years I have noticed that many decent and knowledgable people drop off of these boards because of their increased stress or frustration from these boards. I think it's a shame. I found that these things help me, so I thought I'd share this story.

A while back I had gotten into some type of discussion with Ed Davis. It did get heated and at one point he even insulted me. Anyways, I didn't take it too personal but I did believe that he had an aggressive nature to him and that he was sort of an a-hole. Well when the event that was held in OK last year came around, I met Ed. We talked quite a bit and he speaks with a smooth voice and is a laid back kind of guy with a good sense of humor and an obvious loving nature towards his dogs just by the way that he spoke of them. Everyone got along there great and there were no attacks or heated debates. I honestly believe that I walked out of there with some friends and Ed was one of them. Great guy. It was nice to see everyone behaving like adults and so this experience once again reinforced my following beliefs.

1) Never, never lie. Keeping track of lies takes alot of effort and eventually you will get caught and it isn't worth the headache and the embarassment. You may get away with it by denying, twisting, having a friend back you up (just this one time) or misleading but it forms a bad habit and eventually it will catch up to you.
2) Everything that is seen on these boards should be taken with a grain of salt. The majority comes from opinions rather than fact, even if it is presented as fact. Remember that most of what you hear and see on these boards would not be let into a courtroom or used as scientific evidence in a study. If you are going to take anything as fact, make sure you verify and then verify again. These boards are a great learning tool if used properly. I look at it as a place to rebound from. It's a great place to learn of new things and what is happening in the dog world. If I see a post that is interesting and it provides an article, book or weblink, then I follow it and possibly look into it deeper. But I wouldn't use it as my end source of information. Which leads me to the next one.
3) Never take anything on these boards too personal. Remember that everyone is here because of their love for their dogs and possibly this breed. Emotion will come into play at times and that is inevitable on all boards. Remember that most dog owners wouldn't even take the time to look up anything on the breed let alone participate on a board.
4) Making friends is one thing, but agreeing with them just because they're your friend will eventually discredit your views. Same thing applies to the organizations.
5) Attacking an organization that you're opposed to and their methods leads to nothing positive. It doesn't help you, your organization of choice and it certainly doesn't help them. So what is the point? Some would say that it is to bring people to the "good" side. Remember that many will be turned off by this approach and they will go to the "bad" side to see what is actually so "bad" about it. In sales this is known as "negative selling" and it doesn't work.
6) Always try to remember that you may be misinterpreting what the other person is saying and that others may misinterpret what you are saying, so try to be clear and open minded and always refer to # 3.
7) Don't beat a dead horse and try to learn how to gracefully drop out of a discussion when it starts to get heated. Admittedly this has been the hardest for me, but I'm working on it. Norman has also been going to counseling :) Which leads to my next point.
8) Smiley face means humor. Relax and try to enjoy the abundance of it on these boards.

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