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Date Posted: 23:22:16 01/04/08 Fri
Author: Mary
Author Host/IP: cpe-72-224-142-55.maine.res.rr.com / 72.224.142.55
Subject: Characters & Shadows - Chapter 27.
In reply to: Mary 's message, "Characters & Shadows - Cont." on 15:23:40 01/01/08 Tue

Chapter 27

Michael heard her waking and looked at the clock. It was way past 8:00, heading for 9:00 and he hoped she wouldn’t be angry at him for letting her rest. He had been sitting here watching her sleep for a while now. The snow continued to fall outside and according to the reports it was not going to let up until at least morning. Which was fine with him, he had already decided that he was not leaving her side no matter what. She needed him and he was going to be there for her.

He was now thinking about the strange phone call and what all of it meant. He knew that until he got answers from her nothing would make sense. Her sleep had not been restful the last couple of hours and he had noted the beads of sweat on her forehead indicating fever a little while ago. Nikita was sick and that had to be his priority right now. But something was going on that she was going to have to share with him. He was very concerned that she was in danger and having anything happen to her now just wasn’t a possibility in his mind at all.

He moved from the chair to sit beside her on the bed as she continued to stir. Her blue eyes fluttered open and he felt that stirring in his heart that this woman seems to have stolen without even knowing it.

She sleepily whispered with a small smile, “Michael.”

Just the mention of his name coming from her brought him some sense of peace as he looked down at her, “Hey sleepy. How are you feeling?”

Her hand went to her forehead, “My head doesn’t hurt as much right now. But I feel clammy.” She said making a face.

He smiled at her, “I think you may still have a low fever. Some more Tylenol may help with that.”

She was starting to really wake up now and pushed herself up on her elbows. He backed away a bit to give her space but stayed close. She looked around the room and her eyes landed on the clock that read 8:57. She turned to look at him her eyes like daggers, “You were supposed to wake me at 7:00 damnit!”

She pushed back the covers and started to sit but once again her balance was not great and Michael pushed her to lay back down as he saw all color drain from her face, “Just lay there for a moment.” He told her softly.

“You don’t understand. I can’t.” she told him weakly. Her mind was racing with what she was going to do. She had to get Michael out of her apartment right away and then call Kip. He wouldn’t be too pissed if she was just a few minutes late. But she needed to move fast.

“Of course you can. I’ll make you something to eat in a while and that will help. I bet you haven’t eaten all day.”

She ignored his attempts at distracting her. She wanted to just melt into his arms and stay exactly where she was. His gorgeous soft green eyes looking at her with such care and concern almost broke her heart. It would be so easy to give in to him. So easy to just go back to sleep knowing he was here and knowing he would continue to be here whenever she awoke again.

But reality invaded her thoughts and she knew that she didn’t have that kind of luxury, not in her life. She never should have involved herself with him at all, it had been horribly selfish and stupid. She should have known better. He wasn’t safe here with her, he never would be. She could never tell him the truth and he would never understand even if she could.

She knew what she had to do, “I’m really not hungry. And I feel much better. If you’ll excuse me…”

Her tone turned cold so quickly and he had watched her eyes change as thoughts had raced through her mind. She had sorted through possibilities in her head and now she had decided on something. He gave her just a moment as he moved back to allow her room to get up, which she did on her own even if a little unsteady. She grabbed her robe and wrapped it tightly around herself but not before he noticed her trembling.

She turned and started down the stairs, “I appreciate your help today and I know that I was too tired for my own good. But I am feeling much better.”

Startled but collecting himself quickly he followed her and watched as she strategically leaned against the counter trying as hard as possible to appear perfectly normal. Ok, I can play along for a moment he thought. “Well, if you’re not hungry, I am. Why don’t I just make something for us while you have a seat.”

But she was quick to protest, “No I don’t think so. Look I really am grateful for you bringing me home. But I need some privacy tonight. I’m sure you understand and I’ll see you in the morning.”

He stood there staring at her as he crossed his arms over his chest and took a determined stance, “No. I don’t think so.”

“Excuse me?” she asked indignant now and taking her own determined posture as best she could.

“You’re not well and I think you need my help. I said no. I’m not going anywhere.”

Now she was pissed. How dare he? Who did he think he was giving her orders like that? She had taken enough orders for enough years and she swore that she would never let another man dictate her life ever. And he couldn’t stay anyway, no matter what. It had been a nice little romp with Michael, but she had been a fool to think that she might actually be able to be involved with him or with anyone ever again for that matter. Her heart screamed at her for what she was thinking but she knew it had to be done. Summoning every ounce of strength she had into her anger she stood tall, “Oh yes you are. I’m fine and I can take care of myself. Now I thanked you for today but you need to go.”

He realized that she was serious. She actually meant what she was saying. But a large part of her was acting out of fear. He could see it in her eyes, she hurt, she ached to be doing this but fear was driving her. What was really going on?

Using a softer tone he tried to reach out to her, “I said I’m not going Nikita and I meant it. But it’s because I love you and I really think you need me right now. Please whatever is going on that you hide so carefully…please…let me help you.”

Oh his softness was almost her undoing. It would be so easy to fall into his arms and forget for a while just what a nightmare her life was. But that would be so cruel to him. So wrong. He was too kind, too open, too loving. He had no idea of the kind of evil and darkness that she could bring into his life. David would kill him if he ever discovered that she had been with him. He wouldn’t hesitate, not for a second.

She thought about poor innocent Jared. Such a nice young man. He had helped her so much in learning how to act and dress just how David wanted her to be. He taught her how to walk and talk in just the manner that David wanted. He made her laugh and he had been her friend, a real friend. Until that terrible night of horrible allegations and David’s insane jealousy led to the monstrous unnecessary death of such a kind gentle man. No, Nikita knew after that night that no one would ever be safe with her as long as she was ‘owned’ by David. And she knew that she would never really be free of him.

Using the coldest, nasty tone she could possible summon she sneered at him, “I don’t need or want your help. Look Mikey, the sex has been good. But let’s not make this more than it is. Just sex. Stay out of my life would you?”

“You don’t mean that.” But he began to question in his head if she did.

“You don’t know me. You don’t know anything about me. You don’t know who I am or what I am capable of. I don’t have room in my life for you. You ‘need’ too much.” God this hurt so much, please just go, make this just a little bit easier Michael.

“That’s bullshit Nikita and you know it.”

“It’s not. Now we can work together but that’s it. I asked you to leave and I meant it. Get out.” With that she turned and yanked open the door indicating for him to go.

Now he was confused, angry, frustrated, he wanted to shake some sense into her and at the same time he was so angry. He grabbed for his coat and pushed past her in his anger which as hard as he was trying to suppress it, he was being unsuccessful, things just got out of control so fast. He asked with his own nasty tone the one thing that his mind could process at the moment, “Is it about the guy that was on the phone?”

She froze, completely. Oh my God. “What? What guy?”

But his anger at the moment kept him from seeing her real reaction to his question, “The one that called. Said ‘they’ were close. Whatever the hell that means.”

He then stormed off down the hallway and she quickly closed and locked the door and then slid down to the floor. Tears fell as she drew her knees up and sobbed in terror and pain. She has just pushed him out of her life and it hurt more than she could ever imagine. He was gone and she was once again all by herself. Alone.

But even worse, much more terrifyingly worse, was that Marco had called and she hadn’t known it. Michael had taken the call, that was incredibly dangerous alone. But Marco had said they were close. How close? She didn’t know. But she knew the last thing that Marco told her was to stay here. She didn’t have a choice. She would have to wait for him to call again to find out anything else.

Survival. She had to think about survival. That meant she had to go to work. Oh God, Kip, work! She pushed herself and using the wall for support she caught her balance and made herself go upstairs to get dressed. She had to go to work. Survive. She had to survive.

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