| Subject: Priority Mail 352 |
Author:
Nikita507
|
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
Date Posted: Saturday, December 10, 11:42:19pm
In reply to:
Nikita507
's message, "Priority Mail 349+" on Saturday, December 03, 08:17:06pm
Michael didn’t know how long he had stood at the doorway to his daughter’s room, watching her sleep, but he knew that it had been too long. But it was hard to move away as it had taken so much to find her and in ways it felt way too easy to get her here. She had told Todd simply that she was home with her mom and dad and that she would not need to go to the hotel with him when he stopped by for dinner. She proceeded to tell Nikita that she was going to tuck her in.
Michael had showed Todd out and had come upstairs to find Nikita on the side of the bed with one of the few books that they had for a young child in her hand, reading to April as she was on the bed that Nikita felt was not enough for her. But April didn’t care that the bedding was some of Adam’s old bedding for now. She had her mother with her and Michael knew that it mattered. He had then gone in to check in with Adam.
There was something going on with Adam, but Michael couldn’t get his son to talk about it. Michael wasn’t sure if this issue was still related to whatever was happening between him and Lisa since they had that falling out or if it was something to do with his newly found sister. When Adam wouldn’t open up about that, Michael stayed in the room, talking about other things with his son. There would be a time soon that Michael knew that Adam wouldn’t want him around at all so he had to use as much of this time as possible when Adam was giving it to him.
Michael had walked out just in time to see that Nikita had been cajoled into getting underneath the sheets by their daughter. She was slipping out even as April tried to protest behind her closed eyes. It was a bit early, but the day had certainly been full. Nikita touched April’s cheek and hugged her gently. She leaned down and paused in thought before standing up to tip-toe out of the room. She looked at Michael and smiled. “She is tired.”
“Yeah,” Michael nodded his head and he touched Nikita’s face. “We both are too.”
“I’m going to bed now,” Nikita admitted and Michael agreed that it was a nice idea. “I just want to watch her for a bit… I’ll be right behind you.”
But Michael hadn’t been right behind Nikita. He got stuck there, watching April sleep. He knew that it didn’t make sense but he hadn’t had a chance to watch over her when she was younger and he felt that he had to make up some of that time now. Adam had slipped out to go downstairs for something to snack on. He only shook his head and rolled his eyes as he passed his father without a word. It told Michael that it was time to go to bed. He rubbed his face as he stifled a yawn and knew that it was the answer.
Opening the door to their bedroom, Michael stopped as his ears alerted to a sound that he hadn’t expected to hear. Nikita crying.
Michael silently shut the door and moved to the edge of the bed where Nikita sat in one of his t-shirts, her head dropped down as she was holding her face in her hands with tears streaming down her face and hands. “Kita… what’s wrong?”
Nikita looked up at Michael and he could see that she had been crying for some time. Perhaps even from the moment she got into the bedroom. “I’m… horrible… at this…”
“What?” Michael asked as he sat down beside Nikita. She shook her head from side to side. “I don’t… want to talk about it…”
“You might be tired right now… we both are… but you aren’t getting off easy by saying that you don’t want to talk about this,” Michael reprimanded Nikita with a gentle voice. “What are you talking about, Kita? What do you think you are horrible at?”
“Being… her mother…” Nikita rasped as she shook her head. “I didn’t know… that she wanted me… in the sheets with her… and I know that the book was too easy… she looked bored… staring at me… and… and I know that she wanted me to kiss her goodnight… and I froze… I’m her mother… and I froze…”
“Kita,” Michael whispered as he shook his head from side to side. “You were amazing with her, Kita.”
“I didn’t know… what I was doing…”
“Come on, Kita,” Michael whispered as he reached over to cup her face. “You are exhausted… and you can’t be expected to know what you have to do all the time… you never do as a parent… but you did everything right. She is happily asleep… and she wasn’t bored… she was enthralled in watching you. April just needed you there…”
“I… I’m not good… at this…” Nikita shook her head and Michael stroked at the tears. “You trust me… so trust me when I tell you that you are doing everything right.”
“How?” Nikita jerked away. “It felt… fake…”
“But you knew what to do… and that shows that you knew what she needed,” Michael gently sighed as he shook his head. “This is hard today because we are both so tired… it has been a draining day…”
“I’m tired,” Nikita admitted. “But I can’t stop thinking…”
“Come on… let’s get into bed…”
“I tried… and it was worse…”
“I’m here now,” Michael replied as he shifted. He got Nikita up and underneath the thin sheets before turning off the lights and slipping in beside her. He wrapped Nikita up in his arms and pressed kisses to her face as she still was lightly crying. “You’ve been amazing, Kita…”
“I don’t know…”
“Kita, you never got tucked in as a child… I’m sure that you never had your mother read to you… this is all completely new to you… but yet you just did it. You gave our daughter what she needed. Your attention so she could feel safe enough to fall asleep in her new home,” Michael slowly spoke as he held onto Nikita.
She didn’t reply but her tears had stopped. Michael knew that Nikita was now doubting her abilities of being a real mother. He knew that there were probably thoughts in her head that since she gave April up when she did that she didn’t get the time to become a mother, that she would do something wrong because of that or because of her own childhood. Michael was going to be the key to making sure that Nikita knew that she was doing the right thing and he knew that he couldn’t get frustrated with that job.
“I don’t know… if I ever felt… this drained…” Nikita uttered as she eased her head down against Michael’s chest. “And I’m happy… but I’m so… tired… but I can’t stop thinking…” Nikita slowly spoke and Michael shifted slightly. “I completely understand.”
Nikita looked up at the ceiling and sighed. “We have to get April some tests… because I saw the reports from her old school and they are so wrong… she knows how to read… and she picked up on that computer too quickly… I think she was even typing… and the school said that she was behind…”
“We don’t have to worry about that now…”
“I know,” Nikita replied. “In the morning we can…”
“Kita, it’s almost six weeks before school starts. We have time,” Michael pointed out as he moved his hands up and down Nikita’s arms, trying to get her to stop worrying.
“But she is smart, Michael. Wicked smart. It has to be from you… because Adam is smart and she is smart…”
“Kita, she is a lot like you,” Michael whispered as he leaned his head closer to Nikita. “She is quick… intuitively smart… that quick intelligence to read people… it might come across as being intelligent to you, but to me, it really reminds me of you.”
“I used to talk a lot,” Nikita rasped and then she cleared her throat, remembering back to when she first got into Section. She had tried anything to talk her way out of Section and she didn’t know how many times Michael told her to shut up. Until he finally pulled her to the side and said if she didn’t find a way to stop talking that she would be cancelled. It was hard not to talk and whenever she could, she had nervously chattered away.
“I miss that about you,” Michael admitted as he pressed a soft kiss to Nikita’s forehead. He had to beat that habit out of Nikita to make sure that she lived, but since they were free, a quiet Nikita was unnerving and he was still adjusting to Nikita’s more introverted personality, hoping that one day she would break away from those tendencies that weren’t part of her true personality.
“So… you think it was her intuitive intelligence that had her come up with the name Sabine?” Nikita’s voice quivered with nervousness. Michael swallowed hard as he didn’t have an answer for this one. He hadn’t even known that Nikita had figured out his mother’s name and to know that she had only thought about it for a few minutes after confirming that she was pregnant did unnerve Michael. But there was no other explanation how April could have figured it out.
“I only thought of her name… twice…” Nikita rasped as she took Michael’s hand into hers. She squeezed her fingers into Michael’s. “I never even spoke it out loud… I couldn’t risk it… someone might have overheard and researched… and somehow link it to you… and I wouldn’t allow that.”
“Would you have named April Sabine?” Michael inquired and Nikita shrugged her shoulders. “You honor tradition and you loved your mother. But you wouldn’t have wanted it to be so literal... maybe Sabina would have been the better choice.”
Nikita rolled to her side to look at Michael. “You think we should allow April to become Sabine?”
“No,” Michael shook his head. “Sabina is much better.”
Nikita blinked her eyes and pushed her chin into Michael’s chest. “That isn’t the name that I would want her to have… but none of us can have the right now.”
Michael shuttered his green eyes as he whispered. “Samuelle.”
“I’m fine with Pomeroy… it makes us a family… well… the three of you so far…” Nikita glanced away. Michael stroked Nikita’s forehead. “You are already Mrs. Samuelle in my mind, heart and soul, Kita.”
Nikita felt the tears roll out of her eyes and she wiped them before Michael could get to them. She looked at Michael and touched her hand to his face; he could feel the wetness of her tears on her fingertips. “Sabina April Pomeroy.”
Michael tilted his head to the side. “We could talk to Tom… there might be a way Kita.”
Nikita shook her head. “Not worth the risk, Michael.”
Michael kissed Nikita’s forehead. “You should try to go to sleep, darling. You need your rest.”
Nikita shifted and continued to look at Michael. “She is going to be ok, right?”
“April….. Sabina… is going to be fine,” Michael replied as he moved his hand to Nikita’s face, allowing his fingertips to graze her skin lightly. “Close your eyes, Kita… please try to rest…”
“But Michael…”
“Kita,” Michael whispered as he didn’t stop his movements and he lowered the volume of his voice. “Trust me… close your eyes… just focus on my fingers on your face… letting you take a break from thinking… letting you rest. Tomorrow you will have more time to think about things… but tonight, you need to rest.”
Nikita glanced at Michael wearily, but she was being lulled into doing what Michael wanted her to do. Although she fought it, she did close her eyes after a few close calls of closing them and then snapping them back open.
Michael continued to whisper to Nikita to just listen to his words and to feel his fingers. It was working and finally Nikita drifted to sleep, which she needed.
Michael needed to sleep too, but now he was staring at Nikita. His wife in his heart, soul and mind, but not yet legally. That would have to change. He didn’t stop touching Nikita with his fingers as he had to find a way to shut his mind off now, to do exactly what he had to force Nikita to do. But it was so easy to just stare at Nikita like he had stared at his own daughter. He had to find a way to listen to his own advice and know that he could think about how to tell April that they would allow her to change her name to Sabina if that was what she wanted. He could address the worries about how to get a good sense of how intelligent their daughter was and what to do about school for her.
But as Nikita’s body drifted deeper into sleep, Michael felt his body being pulled in the same direction, to enter that state of slumber.
The family needed their rest after a very hectic day.
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
| |
Feedback: 