| Subject: Priority Mail 92 |
Author:
Nikita507
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Date Posted: Saturday, December 18, 06:58:16pm
In reply to:
Nikita507
's message, "Priority Mail 88+" on Thursday, December 16, 05:25:15pm
Nikita turned her head as she heard the door open that separated the small condo from the private patio that she had come out onto. It had been a couple days since they left the building and came to this small resort that had everyone in their own condos with their own private slice of beachfront property. “Did you talk with Davenport?”
“He is on his way back,” Michael nodded his head as he moved to the other reclining lounger that was out on this patio. He looked at Nikita. “You don’t need to go back to that building.”
“Walter will be happy to have his prototypes back,” Nikita stated as she looked at Michael. Yesterday he had talked her into going shopping for clothes. She had only packed for a few days and she had not packed to be on the beach. Nikita also knew that this condo was not just happened to be open when Michael was looking. She was sure that Michael had Jason reserve it for them as soon as she got an ID.
Michael settled and looked out to the ocean. He knew that Nikita was about to speak and he wasn’t about to stop her from doing that. He could already see a difference in how Nikita slept since she started to take the anti-depressant.
“I never thought I’d go back to that building,” Nikita spoke but then she closed her eyes with shame. “Well… at least I thought my thoughts were that I would never go back. It’s kind of obvious that I set it up so that I could come back and get that stuff.”
Michael just moved his eyes to watch Nikita. She shook her head and she leaned forward. “What does that say about me? I think with my head that I’m not going back to that building… but all of my actions and all of the things I did in that building indicated that I had all along intended to go back to that building for… those things?”
Michael turned his head slowly and saw that Nikita expected him to respond. He had to address a couple things here and he knew where to start. “First… I think it’s natural… so don’t think it was crazy or something like that.”
“It does sound like I have split personalities… and they didn’t even know that they were working independently…” Nikita shook her head. She huffed her breath out and looked at Michael while shaking her head slightly from side to side. “Madeline would have a field day analyzing these thoughts.”
Michael smiled gently and nodded his head. But the fact was Madeline wasn’t needed. “I think it’s a simple answer… but sometimes the simple answers are the hardest to see.”
“Are you going to tell me?”
“Yes,” Michael nodded his head up and down while turning on the recliner to turn towards Nikita. “The mind that was saying that you were never going back to that building, that’s the person you had to be because of Section… it was the one that was afraid of everything and plotting all ends to means.”
Nikita stared at Michael and he paused for a moment. “It was your heart… the person you really truly are that made the preparations to save everything in that building to never be destroyed in a manner that wasn’t controlled by you… and it was that person who always thought that someday you would be back.”
Nikita was processing what Michael had said. She pulled her feet up closer to her body and rubbed her bare legs. “It does sometime feel like… a battle... I know that Section doesn’t exist…”
“I haven’t lost that part of me either, Kita.” Michael stretched and rolled his head to the left. “We never will fully lose that part that is always on alert, always looking for people plotting against us, always checking and rechecking… and always ready to flight if too much danger is nearby.”
Nikita rubbed her feet and leaned her head down on her knees to look at Michael. “I don’t seem to be able to control when I think of things…”
Michael blinked his green eyes and moved closer to the edge of the recliner. “The brain is funny like that.”
“I used to just try to be numb… so that I didn’t think. It didn’t work most of the time.”
“You don’t have to talk about the details, Kita,” Michael compromised gently. “Just know that I can listen to any of the details… at any point. Just don’t try to force it either to try to get what you consider to be healthy.”
“I’m not going to take this medicine forever, Michael,” Nikita warned as she still did not lift her head. “I didn’t expect you to.”
“You’ve been out for a while… you do get to normal, right?” Nikita questioned and Michael nodded his head as he finally stood up and moved to the same recliner that Nikita was in. “You start having the all-the-time reminders of Section… but normal… normal is highly overrated, Kita. You know that.”
Nikita rubbed her nose with her fingers and then looked at Michael. “I’d take normal and boring any day.”
“Right now you say that,” Michael pointed out as he rubbed her feet with his hands. “Can I ask you some questions?”
Nikita hesitated and Michael leaned down. “You don’t have to answer anything that you don’t want too.”
Nikita pulled her head up and nodded it slightly up and down.”I’ll try, Michael.”
Michael smiled at Nikita and was finally able to move his hands up to her knees. He squeezed them and looked at Nikita carefully. “What memories are the hardest?”
Nikita looked at Michael and placed her hands on his. She rubbed them up and down as she thought about how to say what she needed to do. “There tends to be two main areas… the end with my guards and the baby.”
Michael wasn’t surprised by that at all. “But there are other things?”
“Stuff between us… the bad missions sometimes… often just because something reminds me of something about them,” Nikita admitted as she looked at her hands over Michael’s. “We had some good times too… “
“You can remember those,” Michael whispered and Nikita nodded her head. “Until recently… even those hurt too much.”
Michael leaned his chin down to Nikita’s knees. “What hurts more? Remembering what you had to do to your guards… or what the baby?”
Nikita closed her eyes with pain right away. Both hurt. Both were different. She forced herself to be brave and opened her eyes to gaze at Michael. “Can’t be compared. Both hurt… different ways.”
“Our daughter is alive because of what you did,” Michael stated and Nikita nodded her head as she moved one of her hands and touched Michael’s hair. “I know.”
“Ethan was going to die,” Michael spoke and Nikita jerked her hands away. “I didn’t tell you that.”
“Jason found his medical records,” Michael reached his hand out and stroked the hair off of Nikita’s shoulder. “And while I’m telling you the truth… Jason also found a picture of Mick on the internet. We located the city, but found out that it was Savannah about three years ago.”
“Mick is smarter than you ever gave him credit for,” Nikita warned and Michael smiled. He was beginning to think that. “What do you know about Mick?”
“The baby wasn’t the only time that I had to ask him for a favor… he got better, Michael. He won’t be easy to find,” Nikita warned and Michael sighed. He didn’t like the sound of it. Nikita placed her hands back into Michael’s hair. “I said that it wouldn’t be easy. I didn’t say it wouldn’t be possible.”
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