Don't try to stop me - because I'm falling fast into this pit of fire that surrounds us all. In a blanket of fear that I've been trapped in for years, don't try and stop me - you can't stop me. -- Realistic Dreams : The Present : The Park

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Date Posted: 23:22:49 01/21/04 Wed
Author: Angel
Subject: Don't try to stop me - because I'm falling fast into this pit of fire that surrounds us all. In a blanket of fear that I've been trapped in for years, don't try and stop me - you can't stop me.

The weather had turned mild so she'd brought the baby out for the fresh air - she wasn't scared of running into Parker, because she knew she had proper ammunition, but she just didn't want to see him, that was all there was to it. She settled on a bench - Travis had fallen asleep in his carrier, and she sat now, with a hat tugged over her blonde curls, but with no glasses - she wasn't afraid for anyone to see what someone had done to her - she wanted people to know.

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Replies:

and here he was - the person she least wanted to see. He stood there and watched her, hands in his pockets, clad in black chords adn a white muscle shirt and a jacket. He bit his lip, beginning to walk over, before stopping halfway, beginning to second guess his actions.. (NT) -- Parker, 23:26:50 01/21/04 Wed
She didn't notice him, didn't see him - in fact, was totally oblivious to him, as she sat, her legs crossed, and bouncing a little as she watched people passing by on the unusually warm day. (NT) -- Angel, 23:30:57 01/21/04 Wed
he thought the better of it and walked by her..or..in front of her. If she spoke to him, then he'd talk back..if she didn't want to talk to him, then he wouldn't bother..maybe.. (NT) -- Parker, 23:32:54 01/21/04 Wed
She was a little surprised to see him walk by, and jumped a little, frowning. But she did remain silent. (NT) -- Angel, 23:37:50 01/21/04 Wed
he chewed his lip, and he moved to sit next to her, keeping to one end of the bench..he didn't want to intrude - he didn't want her afraid of him. The look to his face was a bit pained, his brow knotted (NT) -- Parker, 23:40:16 01/21/04 Wed
She felt an instant headache coming on with just the presence of him, and she looked over - her expression just as pained as his, her bruise quite pronounced against skin that turned pale in the winter. (NT) -- Angel, 23:43:32 01/21/04 Wed
he turned his glance to the ground, ashamed of himself, knotting his fingers together. He had never held Travis..hardly ever looked at the child. He sighed a bit, leaning against the back of the bench, looking to the sky, twiddling his thumbs.. (NT) -- Parker, 23:46:23 01/21/04 Wed
She squared her eyes on him, they were like swords going right through him, and frowned. She hoped he felt bad, she hoped he was embarrassed. (NT) -- Angel, 23:52:47 01/21/04 Wed
he felt all of those things that wasn't even the half of it. He cleared his throat a bit as she gave him that icy look and began to chew his lip. "Angel..I am so sorry.." (NT) -- Parker, 23:55:44 01/21/04 Wed
She straightened her spine out, grateful that Travis was asleep,and she could tell him these things without dealing with the babe. "No, I don't want to hear that, Parker. I just want to tell you some things and I want you to listen." (NT) -- Ange;, 00:02:45 01/22/04 Thu
he turned, biting his lip, wacthing her. He knew he probably wouldn't like what he was about to hear, but he was listening.. (NT) -- Parker, 00:06:25 01/22/04 Thu
"I'm finished with you, Parker. I'm sorry." She paused and took a breath before she squared him up again. "I'd like an anullment." (NT) -- Angel, 00:07:51 01/22/04 Thu
first of all, he could not believe what he was hearing, then again..it shouldn't have come as such a big surprise. He swallowed, setting his jaw, looking at her "I..I don't want a divorce.." (NT) -- Parker, 00:11:57 01/22/04 Thu
She had to remain steadfast on this or he would be back in her house before she knew it. "A seperation at least." (NT) -- Angel, 02:21:20 01/22/04 Thu
he frowned, watching her, lips pursed "..that's the same thing, Angel.." (NT) -- Parker, 02:25:33 01/22/04 Thu
"That's what I want." She nodded firmly, looking up at him. (NT) -- Kev, 02:27:56 01/22/04 Thu
he chewed his lip, brow furrowed, feeling a bit distraught "Can't we just talk about this..? Work something else out..?" (NT) -- Parker, 02:29:47 01/22/04 Thu
"Parker.. " It did pain her, it really did. "You hit me twice. Once, you hit me in front of people. I may not have very much respect for my body sexually, but you can't do that to me." (NT) -- Angel, 02:34:25 01/22/04 Thu
"I'm sorry Angel..I was just..I just needed to.." he sighed "Look, I know nothing can justify what I did to you..but can we please just..stay together..?" (NT) -- Parker, 02:38:28 01/22/04 Thu
She lowered her brows at him and shook her head. "You can't come back to my house." (NT) -- Angel, 02:41:30 01/22/04 Thu
he sighed, runnign a hand through his hair, lips softly to her hand, taking off his wedding band, handing it to her "Have a nice life, Angel.." he should just give up..he hated knowing he couldn't be with her.. (NT) -- Parker, 02:44:31 01/22/04 Thu
She took the band, and held it in the palm of her hand - it felt as though it was burning her, and she only held it tighter, squeezing it so the edges formed an imprint on her palm. "I don't know how you can fix this parker." (NT) -- Angel, 02:46:06 01/22/04 Thu
he looked at her, eyes locked on hers "Do you want me to fix it..?" (NT) -- Parker, 02:48:19 01/22/04 Thu
"More than anything else in the world." She swallowed a little, and continued to hold the band. (NT) -- Angel, 02:50:29 01/22/04 Thu
he hand moved tentativley to hers..unsure of wether to hold it or not "You'd have to help me.." (NT) -- Parker, 02:53:15 01/22/04 Thu
She pulled her hand away from his, and folded it in her other one on her lap. "I'm pregnant again, Parker." (NT) -- Angel, 02:56:02 01/22/04 Thu
he didn't question wether it was his or not..it had to be his..he swallowed "When did you find out..?" (NT) -- Parker, 02:57:55 01/22/04 Thu
"The day before you left." She swallowed a little bit, and looked down at Travis. He was still swaddling, she'd have trouble with another one so young - she needed someone to be with her. (NT) -- Angel, 02:59:53 01/22/04 Thu
he nodded, having taken his hand back "Why didn't you tell me then..?" then maybe he would have thought..maybe he wouldn't have hit her..maybe they would still be together..playing happy families (NT) -- Parker, 03:04:06 01/22/04 Thu
"Would that have stopped you, Parker? Would I have been too veunerable to hit then?" She frowned. (NT) -- Angel, 23:26:23 01/22/04 Thu
he pulled his legs up onto the bench, hugging his knees, looking like an ashamed child. "No..I probably wouldn'y have hit you. I don't know why I did it in the first place..You want to fix it but you can't seem to forgive me.." he sighed, somewhat afraid - he didn't want their relationship to end. Especially not with a child on the way.. (NT) -- Parker, 23:32:16 01/22/04 Thu
"I don't want this child to grow up without a father." She looked up at him plaintatively, ignoring his comment about forgiving him. "Did you ever hit Krista?" (NT) -- Angel, 23:34:07 01/22/04 Thu
he frowned a bit, shaking his head "No..never.." (NT) -- Parker, 23:36:18 01/22/04 Thu
"Did you know she was going to have your baby?" Her anger had quieted itself, bottled itself up inside of her and now her voice was small, and she seemed subdued. (NT) -- Angel, 23:39:10 01/22/04 Thu
he shook his head in disbelief, a large breath taken in, tightening his grip around his knees..Why was she telling him all of this now..? Why had she bothered..? He didn't want to know. It would have been so much easier if he hadn't known.. (NT) -- Parker, 23:43:42 01/22/04 Thu
Now that she had him, had him suspended in grief, that would have been when she would have given a death blow, or gotten up and walked away, but she couldn't. She was riveted, just sitting there, watching him. (NT) -- Angel, 23:45:28 01/22/04 Thu
he buried his face in his arms, not about to cry in front of her.. There was too much going on. He could lose everything. His best friend, a babay, a wife and another child.. In fact, he probably allready had.. (NT) -- Parker, 23:49:09 01/22/04 Thu
She hated to see him so broken, and she tentatively reached over, putting her hand flat across his lean shoulders. (NT) -- Angel, 23:50:57 01/22/04 Thu
he frowned a bit as she put her arm on him, lifting his head up to look at her "I think you'd better go.." he was eriously on the verge of tears, and he didn't want her to see him like that..ever. He just wanted to be someone she could confide in. Someone that she could trust..but it looked like he'd ruined that much, anyway (NT) -- Parker, 23:55:30 01/22/04 Thu
She saw right though him, right through his eyes, and saw how much what she'd told him had hurt him. "No." (NT) -- Angel, 23:57:19 01/22/04 Thu
he swallowed "You're right Angel..you can't be around someone who will hurt you..I think you should go.." he chewed his lip, still watching her (NT) -- Parker, 00:01:01 01/23/04 Fri
Now that he actually wanted her to go, she didn't want to anymore. "I can't.." (NT) -- Angel, 00:06:52 01/23/04 Fri
he frowned a bit, putting his legs down, holding back his tears "Why not..? You wanted to before..you wanted a divorce.." (NT) -- Parker, 00:09:26 01/23/04 Fri
"I can't leave you like this, Parker. You're devastated." (NT) -- Angel, 00:11:16 01/23/04 Fri
he chewed his lip, watching her "What do you expect..? I've lost my wife, my brother and my children..I could lose my best friend.." (NT) -- Parker, 03:05:25 01/23/04 Fri
She raised a brow at that, a little unsure of what he was talking about. "Krista?" (NT) -- Angel, 03:07:38 01/23/04 Fri
he nodded, gaze moving to sweep over the park. He sighed a bit "Yeah.." (NT) -- Parker, 03:09:28 01/23/04 Fri
She frowned a little bit at that and wound her arms over her stomach - it bothered her a little bit that he considered Krista his best friend.. she'd always read that married couples should be each other's best friends. (NT) -- Angel, 03:12:08 01/23/04 Fri
he watched her, in her sudden self-indulgence..frowning a bit "Does that bother you..?" he questioned, brow furrowed (NT) -- Parker, 03:25:14 01/23/04 Fri
She couldn't lie to him - Krista was his best friend, and then his lover - she didn't like the math in that. "Yes." (NT) -- Angel, 03:30:52 01/23/04 Fri
he smirked a bit, shaking his head "No one ever told you you can have more than one best friend..?" (NT) -- Parker, 03:32:46 01/23/04 Fri
She frowned - she didn't take it that lightly. "You're not supposed to have sex with your best friend. Well, the one that's not your wife, anyways." (NT) -- Angel, 03:35:01 01/23/04 Fri
he frowned "And you're not supposed to sleep with your husbands brother. More than once.." (NT) -- Parker, 03:38:17 01/23/04 Fri
She frowned. "We weren't married the first time.. or the second time, in fact." (NT) -- Angel, 03:47:19 01/23/04 Fri
his eyes narrowed a bit "Oh..So you have to be married to me to not be tempted to sleep with someone else..?" (NT) -- Parker, 03:50:52 01/23/04 Fri
She rolled her eyes and got up. "For God's sake, Parker. We're through." (NT) -- Angel, 03:53:52 01/23/04 Fri
he swallowed. They hd been going allright until she had started telling him all of these things..And now it was definite. They were over. "Don't expect me to even look at that child.." (NT) -- Parker, 03:56:37 01/23/04 Fri
She picked up Travis' carrier, and raised a brow to him. "Don't expect to see the other one either." (NT) -- Angel, 03:57:37 01/23/04 Fri
he scowled, watching her go - he had lost everything "Wasn't counting on it.." (NT) -- Parker, 04:00:13 01/23/04 Fri
She just shook her head at him and took off, her stride sure, and confident, but she felt like she was dying inside. (NT) -- Angel, 04:02:22 01/23/04 Fri