Trailer Talk: May Sweeps -- Alternative Quadrant Message Board

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Subject: Trailer Talk: May Sweeps

Author:
Chuckie

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Date Posted: 09:34:56 05/03/01 Thu

("Beam Onboard", fast redux of the Voyager crew phalanx and Voyager fly by)

BEAM ON BOARD IN MAY FOR THE FINAL FOUR EPISODES OF STAR TREK VOYAGER

(the Doctor kneels and professes on the holodeck and has witnesses to back him)

Doctor: I love you, Seven.

(Seven's eyebrow goes up)

THIS IS THE MONTH YOU'VE WAITED FOR

(Seven in uniform but her hair down watches Nature Girl (WOWZA!!!!!) do the Crane Technique in the deep woods)

[Me: Did you SEE how babe-a-liscious that Nature Girl is?!?]

[Editor: Shhh. I'm�I'm listening. Yeah, listening.]

[Me: And did you SEE how Seven is checking out that hot bod? Woo Hoo!]

[Editor: Straining to�hear.]

(Seven stands reeeaaaalllly close behind Nature Girl doing the Crane Technique in front of the Worst. CGI waterfall. Ever.)

THESE ARE THE EPISODES WHERE THE ULTIMATE QUESTION WILL FINALLY BE ANSWERED

[Begin Multiple Choice of Which Final Question To Be Answered:]

1. Chakotay's shuttle is crashing - will he survive to crash again?
2. Chakotay battles Evil Janeway as she evilly tries to inject him - will she finally be rid of him?
3. Gray-temple'd Tuvok looks grouchily up from writing by candlelight - is he overcome by emotion?
4. B'Elanna screams in the Doctor's face, Tom's hands rest on her pregnant belly - will she finally birth a baby and get over herself already?
5. Voyager follows a smaller craft into the atmosphere of�Earth(?) - will they make it home?

WILL THEY MAKE IT HOME?

[So, the answer was 5. Or, rather, the question was 5. Whatever.]

(Chakotay, Janeway, Seven and Tuvok get serious in Astrometrics, Janeway lectures)

Janeway: We're not going to attempt this unless everyone in this room agrees.

(Janeway's granite Jaw Of Authority (She's SO DAMNED HOT! Sorry.), a ship fires on The Delta Flyer, Neelix Tom and B'Elanna work the Flyer's controls as consoles blow, Tuvok is thrown around in his seat, Chakotay roughly pulls Seven into a romantic embrace in his darkened quarters)

[The fuh!?!]

IT'S ALL LEADING UP TO MAY'S BIGGEST EVENT

(the Borg queen gleams regally green, an aging Klingon peers out from a viewscreen)

Klingon: You'll PAY for your deceit!

(Janeway gives him an *innocent look*, "2 Hour Series Finale")

THE TWO HOUR SERIES FINALE

(Voyager flies away from yet another blowing up Borg Cube *yawn*, Green Queenie Borg lies face down and whispering on the floor)

Queenie: Janeway is about to die.

(a Klingon warship comes in firing, *explosion*, Janeway looks SO HOT with white hair)

STAR TREK VOYAGER

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