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Date Posted: 10:26:20 03/10/10 Wed
Author: jesse (calm)
Subject: Re: pauly and tori
In reply to: AlexLee 's message, "Re: pauly and tori" on 12:14:30 03/18/09 Wed

>>>No problem with the idea that Jake was arrogant. Of
>>>course he was. (Also dumb: Why would anyone show up
>>>for a meeting advertised as "dark noon for you?") But
>>>I'm not sure he knew enough about the true nature of
>>>Tori's relationship with Pauly to be in a position to
>>>take it seriously. We don't see much of his
>>>relationship with Tori because that's not what the
>>>movie's about. But remember, Tori was doing her
>>>darnest to present herself to him and to most of the
>>>world as a straight girl who had no real feelings for
>>>Pauly. Pauly and Mary may be the only people who knew
>>>differently.
>>>
>>>Alex
>>
>>>But
>>>I'm not sure he knew enough about the true nature of
>>>Tori's relationship with Pauly to be in a position to
>>>take it seriously.
>>
>>do you think so? ...hm... you know the situation
>>reminds me of experiences of myself. their was a boy,
>>who wanted to be together with my girlfriend. he and
>>me knew each other and spent time together. we were
>>not the best friends, but liked each other. he flirted
>>with my girlfriend you know, as if i was
>>air/nothing!(why she answered his flirt is another
>>point, i just want to focuse on him in this point)
>>because in his head there was not the possibility of
>>"two girls could really be in love". you understand???
>>i expirienced it it is true!and when i saw jake i had
>>the same feeling. i got the impression the main thing
>>he is interested is himself. and to have a nice-
>>looking girlfriend to have sex with, thatīs all!
>>they had sex in the first night, without knowing each
>>other. i think people who love each other would take
>>more time to enjoy their love!!! to talk, smile at
>>each other, look in each others eyes, to come close to
>>each other. i think and hope ;) also boys work like
>>this when they are in love, arenīt they?!
>>AND: jake would have feeled that tori is not in love
>>with him, if he was really interested in a love-
>>relationchip with her, i am convinced.no he was not
>>looking in her heart and he didnīt want to in his
>>supperficial way of life. all people who thought tori
>>is not "that way" where afraid of a change and
>>"something that is different/NEW"(like tori herself)
>>or/and wanted to believe in a lie, MORE than to see
>>the truth!!! if somebody wanted to know about the
>>truth, he/she would have go to tori or pauli and ask
>>for THE TRUTH honestly, respectfully with an open
>>heart. : )
>>but that didnīt happen. pauli and the love was left by
>>all, ALL, ALL, ALL persons! that is the h u r ting
>>thing in that film. but i am happy it is s h o w n,
>>because i know this is real happening in our "lovely,
>>perfect (ha,ha,ha) world" and it happend in my own
>>life and could happen again... to be left and feel
>>left by all,accept yourself. and it is saad that
>>things are that way in our way of living. it is a
>>problemthat has to be seen!
>>...to talk about love in a l e s s o n as the most
>>important, and the most worthy thing and to spy on it
>>in daily life!! you know by yourself what i mean, you
>>live now like me and see it!
>>i also think pauli is o.k. that she jumped! i just
>>wished there could be another way! : )
>>
>>wrote pain..., that dreams of being happiness again.
>
>
>I think i totally understand where you're coming from.
>Somehow when two girls are in a relationship, (of any
>labels), and when a boy comes between them and starts
>to flirt/go after one of them, he pays absolutely NO
>ATTENTION to the other one. It's almost as though he
>has no respect that the two girls are in love and one
>is the other's. It's more like having a double
>standard. If there's a straight couple and say another
>guy wants to cut in, it's like there will be some
>mental barrier in his head that "oh this girl is with
>that dude" kinda thing. I'm not saying it applies to
>all men. It's more of like those who are full of their
>male egos. I've seen/heard them saying things like,
>"oh why not let me show you what a real man is like."
>and this happens especially so if one of the girl is
>butch identified. If both happens to be girly girls,
>then it's somehow stucked in their head to see the
>girls as merely bestfriends. Perhaps time might have
>changed now but this kinda things i believe still
>occur around the world.
I agree with most things here. But i don't think that paulie put tory on a pedestal. Paulie realy loves tory in spite of all her weaknesses, illustrated by the passage where she tells she can see when tory is lying.
I think that the duel part is mostly a flaw in the script and meant to illustrate paulies strength as well as the level of insanity she is supposed to have reached than.

I want to comment on the things sayd above about guys not taking the love between women seriously: i am a guy and i've been in love with another guy and more or less the same thing that happened to paulie in the movie, happened to me. I can tell that it also happens that women don't take the love between men seriously.

But anyway. I think that lesbians and gay man are more or less in the same boat here.

I know how deeply humiliating it is when this happens.

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