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Subject: I concur...

Author:
Dawn

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Date Posted: 00:55:12 03/27/05 Sun
In reply to: Judy 's message, "Thank You" on 01:45:16 03/26/05 Sat

Judy,

Your post touched me as well. I just read it tonight, and have been experiencing my own melt-down of sorts this weekend, and contemplating such crazy things as "what would it be like to live in Brisbane," and "Holy shit -- what am I talking about?!" Do I want to commute every day to Oakland/Piedmont? Shall I trash the whole process of my new office space on Piedmont Ave.? Should I really sign the 5-yr. lease? Maybe there's a reason I haven't signed on the dotted line...and if not, then what? What about how excited I was to WALK to my office space from my home? Only 2 blocks -- and such a cute Italian-flavored fun little place at such a great location...

I INTENTIONALLY moved to Piedmont 7 months ago to be near my Spiritual Community. I guess I already have a history of moving to be near community, but this is not only my home, but also my business too. And I'm committed to community -- and it's a focus of my practice, yet I've been trying to build it essentially by myself (the paradox), and it's been really tough on me.

I'm tired of doing everything alone. Tonight I didn't want to do anything. I didn't want to go home either. I hung out with the community for the last 2 days, and got really full. Returning home to an empty house -- lovely and peaceful though it is -- feels lonely.

I read your post, and I started to cry, and cry, and cry. Then I called R and even posed the idea of living at the Golden Aster, and he told me that as of yesterday there's no room in the inn for DawnY as you're moving in! (How wonderful for you!) But there is a room at the SC house...

So I feel a bit crazy myself, even considering leaving my sweet space in Piedmont that is virtually impossible to find without being divinely guided (which I really was -- another story).

And what about my practice members? I can't move before I have a place to practice out of -- which is still currently my home. I suppose I could move my bedroom and leave the 'office' portion until I could move it to another location?

And do I REALLY jump down the rabbit hole and accept N's offer of practicing at OT? I might not have picked the neighborhood, but I'm in love with the center and the people. And while there aren't beautiful fountains and wooded paths to walk around, the vibe of community and the senses more than offsets my original desire for a more serene neighborhood. It IS about being IN the world, after all.

I can't believe I'm posting this, but it's as well that people know I'm a bit on the edge. You guys are getting to me, with your hints about my moving in. Hmmm...

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